A King and his Horse
by Aria6
Summary: Ichigo's inner hollow is cut off from him and surrounded by enemies. What will he do? And will Ichigo realize what is happening in time? Torture, non-con... definitely not a one-shot now. :)
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: I'm considering leaving this right where it is, as a one-shot. What do you guys thing? :)

The white form leapt from building to building, desperately trying to escape.

Long white hair flowed behind him, the wind tugging on gossamer strands. There was no water here, in this tiny section of Ichigo's inner world. That was no comfort to his inner hollow at the moment. He'd hated the water, but he hated this place even more.

Instead of the buildings of Karakura town, he was existing in a twisted nightmare landscape. The buildings had warped into dark caricatures of Ichigo's inner world, and everywhere he stepped there was broken glass. Fortunately, his shoes defeated it but the footing was treacherous. More than once, he'd landed on his knees. They were bleeding heavily now, and he hated the fact that he was leaving a blood trail behind him.

He'd already fought the intruders. But there were many of them, with powers even darker than his, and he was at a dreadful disadvantage. They could alter the very landscape of this tiny corner of Ichigo's mind, using it to hinder and harm him. The nameless hollow had no idea what they were, but he knew they were not trying to kill him. They wanted to do something infinitely worse.

"King!" He called, too desperate to care about his pride. "Zangetsu! You fuckers, I need some help in here!" But his call went unanswered and, after a moment of mental searching, the hollow knew why. A wall had been created, formed partially out of alien energy but mostly from Ichigo's own desire not to speak to his hollow. And why should he want to hear his hollow? He'd mostly made snide remarks or given him a few threats. It made perfect sense that the King would not want to speak to his Horse, but it was costing them both now. "KING!" He did his very best to penetrate the barrier, then whirled as he heard a soft hiss behind him.

He leapt from the building frantically as the stone deformed, reaching for him in a fist covered in broken glass. Summoning his power he destroyed it with a Getsuga Tenshou, before continuing to run.

Running would not win, but neither would fighting. And if he could only run long enough, perhaps his King would notice that something was wrong with his Horse.

* * *

Two days later.

The hollow knelt on the ground, ignoring the glass grinding into the open wounds on his knees.

He'd been brought to bay like an injured wolf, and pounced upon like a sick deer. Despite the power arrayed against him he'd fought free, but only at a ruinous cost. His black mask was hanging on his face in tatters and his white coat with the black fur ruff was stained thickly with blood. There was a deep wound to his stomach, and he'd managed to heal it just enough that his guts weren't threatening to spill out anymore.

But he was nearly at his limit and the nightmare landscape hadn't changed. There were still more of them, still after him, and he pulled himself to his feet wearily.

"King." He said half-heartedly. "Zangetsu." For the first time, he regretted being such an anti-social bastard. He hadn't talked or seen Zangetsu for weeks, sometimes. Naturally the zanpakuto wouldn't see anything odd in the hollow not being around for a few days. Ichigo should have noticed his strange silence, but the teen was probably just grateful for it.

The inner hollow wondered what these strangers wanted. He didn't think they wanted him dead. Killing him would essentially reduce him to mindlessness, make his power return to Ichigo. Perhaps someday he could regain his senses, but it would take a long time. As a mindless force, he would be a very poor Horse for his King, and Ichigo would discover that as soon as he tried to use his hollow powers. But he would still be there.

He was sure they wanted something more profound for him. If they could… dominate him… force him to submit, they would have compromised the very building blocks of his King's power. They would have stolen away a piece of his soul. Grunting, the hollow forced himself to his feet. He could not allow that to happen. Very briefly, he considered killing himself to ensure that it wouldn't. But his survival instinct simply couldn't stomach the idea and he hissed before launching himself into the sky again.

His movements now were labored and slow, and he sensed something closing in. Something more powerful than the dozens, hundreds of shadows he'd fought and killed. If only he could kill this last thing than maybe, just maybe this would be over. If only…

Readying his sword, he turned to meet this last threat. He felt vaguely surprised as a woman walked out of the shadows. Her skin was pitch black, as unnaturally dark as his was light. Her eyes had black sclera, just like his, and the irises were blood red. Snarling, he felt her power and it was hollow but… tainted. If he'd been told before that a power existed that was darker than his own, he wouldn't have believed it. But it was standing in front of him now.

"Aren't you a pretty one." Her voice was deep and slow, making him think of honeyed molasses. "Even now, you're a beautiful thing. I love the hair." He snarled, glancing at it briefly. His tresses were still long and flowing, but tattered in places and dappled with blood. "I'm going to have so much fun breaking you." She said with such obvious desire that it turned his stomach. He levelled the sword at her, vowing to fight to the death.

"Who are you?" He demanded and she only laughed, sliding a blood red sword out of her scabbard. It looked more like a typical zanpakuto than his version of Zangetsu.

"Who am I? Who are you?" Suddenly, the hollow knew what her answer would be, and she did not disappoint him. "I don't have a name!" Her grin was wide and maniacal, exposing brilliantly white teeth as she leapt at him. He caught her sword on his, but couldn't find it in him to smile back.

The stakes were too high this time.

* * *

The hollow coughed, lifting his head to look at the chains that were holding him in a standing position. They were black and glowed with the red energy of the female hollow who had captured him.

He'd failed. Failed to defeat her and failed to die. Now he was here, chained up in this twisted corner of Ichigo's inner world. Awaiting her pleasure.

Snarling at the thought, he tested his bonds. He would not tamely accept this degradation, this disgusting downfall. He thrashed back and forth but there was no give and his weakened power couldn't hope to shatter the chains. Hissing out a breath, he examined the bonds above him and tried to find a weak point.

He was chained in the centre of the room, his arms held above with chains that led to the ceiling. The shackles on his feet had short chains that led directly to the floor, fixing him quite firmly in place. Between his feet was a drain, set into the black stone, and he grimaced as he thought about what it was for. He hissed again, the sound of an enraged hollow. He could find no weaknesses in this prison he was caught in.

"Tch, you sound like a tea kettle." The inner hollow twitched as her voice came to him unexpectedly. He briefly entertained himself with the thought of how it would feel to slice her open and watch all her insides slide out. Then a black hand stroked his cheek and he tried to bite her, without success. "So hostile. Well, let's get to work." A knife slid through the seams of his clothing, and white fabric fell to the floor. She paced around him, ridding him of everything before looking him over. "Ah, full human anatomy. That will make everything considerably easier." The pleased way she said it made his blood turn to ice, as much as it could for a cold blooded hollow. For the first time, he wished he wasn't quite so similar to his King.

"Fuck you, bitch!" He snapped and regretted the words as her smile widened into a demented grin.

"No, fuck you. But I'll save that particular torment for later." She purred and he swallowed then hissed as the knife caressed his ribs. "It's amazing what you can do with nothing but a knife. Here, let me show you some of your nerves." She said in her syrupy voice and the hollow held back a scream as she began to slowly slice into his skin.

He had no doubt she would be able to show him his nerves.

* * *

"King." The hollow whispered. "Zangetsu." There was no answer, only that barrier. When would they realize that something was wrong?

"Tch, they will never hear you. They will never think to look for you. You should just give up." She whispered in his ear and the hollow snarled, but it was a half-hearted sound at best. He was in too much pain for more. "Look at yourself. I can do so much more." The inner hollow didn't have to look. He knew he looked like he'd swum in a vat of broken glass. His body was lacerated so thoroughly he looked like raw meat. Except his face, strangely. But the black hollow seemed to think his face was too beautiful to mar.

"Fuck you." He said, his voice harsh and heavy. She laughed, an insane titter that reminded him of his own laugh. Perhaps he shouldn't laugh like that anymore. It was really very irritating.

"No, that's for you. But oh, child, why _are_ you resisting?" A black finger teased one of the cuts on his chest, parting the skin and fingering the raw meat inside. He hissed softly at the pain. "For a zanpakuto you don't even like and a King who couldn't care less about you? He doesn't even respect you, you know. You're just a monster to him." She rested a hand on his chest and leaned close, licking his cheek and then trailing her tongue along his jaw. "I was nothing but a monster to my Queen. But then she became a monster too, and we were monsters together. It's so nice, having company. " The inner hollow blinked at that. What was the taint infecting her? What had her Queen done to cause this? "Just give in to me, lovely white thing. We will make your King like us and he will adore you. You will never be alone again." She promised and he gathered all his strength.

"Never. _Never!_" His voice rose to an ear shattering scream. The female hollow just looked at him, tilting her head to one side. "My King would never want this, and I am his Horse." He hissed at her and a maniacal grin split her face.

"Ah, yes. I'm very devoted to my Queen too, you know. But I suppose it's easier for me. It was my Queen's desire, not mine, that led us to this." She licked his cheek again, an obscene parody of sensuousness. The hollow jerked his head away, scowling angrily. "Well. It seems I have to move on to something else." She stepped back, grinning wickedly as she brought something out. The shape of it sent a chill down the hollow's spine. He wasn't a pervert and wasn't particularly interested in his King's erotic dreams about other men, but he still knew where that would go. "My Queen made this for me, but it hasn't been used. Time to test it." She said with a low, sweet chuckle. The white hollow bit his lip until it bled as she roughly inserted the thing, tearing his skin. It was humiliating and vile, but he gradually got used to the burn. This was supposed to be a torment? If so it seemed rather tame –

Then she did something to the thing, and he bit through his own tongue. Pain radiated from that part of his body, sharp pulses of agony that made his body jerk and twist in a parody of intimacy. She was laughing at him, laughing at the convulsions he just couldn't stop. He wanted to beg her to remove it, to have mercy on him, but he knew better. This was a hollow. There would be no mercy.

Finally, though, the pain stopped. He lay limp in his chains, gasping harshly as blood trickled down the corner of his mouth. Then he twitched as he felt her tongue on his thigh, and realized she'd knelt down behind him to lick away the hot blood. He was bleeding freely now.

"That hurt worse than anything you have ever imagined, didn't it?" She said softly and he didn't reply, just glaring down at her. "That was setting number one." She smiled widely as his eyes widened. "There are nine more settings. Let's try number two." As a new bolt of pain hit him, scorching him from the inside out, he did something he had been trying so desperately not to do.

He threw back his head and screamed.

* * *

_How long has it been? King, will you ever come for me?_ The hollow's eyes were dimmed, the gold cracked and crazed. The constant abuse was affecting him on every level, and he could feel his mind beginning to creak. _King… Ichigo…_

He was past feeling any shame or disgust at himself. His body had betrayed him, screaming until he was hoarse. He'd been reduced the sobbing, feeling the hot tears on his cheeks. He'd even begged her to stop, as futile as it was. None of it had done a bit of good, but he'd been unable to stop himself. The pain was too much.

But he hadn't submitted. Still, he resisted. Still, he held out against her. And he could tell the female hollow was becoming impatient with him.

"Do you want me to use the tenth setting again?" She said in his ear and he shuddered at the reminder. That setting had felt like a combination of someone gutting him and setting him on fire, from the inside out. He was only glad he couldn't feel nausea, or he was sure he would have puked. "Submit to us. Give in, beautiful white thing." She roughly tugged on his hair and he gasped at the fresh pain. It felt like his entire body was hypersensitive.

"N-No." Tears slid down his cheeks as he got out that small, painful word. He wanted this to end. He wanted to die, just to make the pain stop. But he could not give up his King. He was a loyal horse. There was a hiss of anger from the black hollow, and her fist hit him in the back, aggravating his wounds.

"You are just too tough!" Her voice was angry and he blinked as she floated into the air, so she could easily take his hands in hers. "Well, we'll see about that." And she began, with slow and deliberate malice, to break all the bones in his fingers. He didn't scream, but he was whimpering in pain by the time she was done. "Submit to us!"

"No." He whispered. He would not let them win. And if she was complaining about it, maybe, just maybe, his King would call upon his powers soon. He would know something was wrong then. She floated down and punched him in the stomach, hard, before walking behind him.

"Setting ten it is." He screamed as she shoved that thing into him again and activated it. The pain made him jerk like a doll on strings, but he didn't care. He was hardly even aware of his screams.

The pain was overwhelming.

* * *

Ichigo scowled as he finally faced his enemy.

The woman was a shinigami he had never met before this day. Her hair was raven black and her skin was pale white. Her eyes were the deepest blue he'd ever seen, and she was gorgeous, easily as beautiful as Orihime.

And now that she'd finally revealed her true allegiance, her aura stank of rot. She raised a hand and his eyes widened as a mask appeared over her face. Reaching up, he tried to pull on his own mask. But nothing happened.

"Hollow! What the hell?" He asked his inner hollow but got no reply. He barely managed to fend off her first strike. She'd achieved a bankai in secret, as well as a Vizard mask, and she was very powerful. And what was that taint in her aura? His power sensing sucked, and even he could feel it. Snarling, Ichigo reached deep within him and prepared himself to compel his hollow to obey. There was a brief resistence and then he felt an odd relief as his hollow powers abruptly answered him. The mask formed over his face and to his surprise, there was a scream of outrage from his opponent.

"You stupid bitch! You were supposed to break him!" Ichigo didn't understand what his opponent was going on about and didn't care. Their swords clashed on equal footing, this time, and he could tell he was the stronger. He pressed his advantage mercilessly, ignoring the odd feeling within himself. Something wasn't quite right but he had no time to examine it.

For the sake of his friends, family and Soul Society, he needed to eliminate this traitor.

* * *

The hollow smiled weakly as the chains melted away, dumping him in a heap onto the floor.

The whole room changed as the chains vanished. The horrible black stone and the broken glass were gone, replaced by familiar water that began washing away the dried blood caked onto his maimed body. He was inside a house now, just a common residential house in Karakura town. The water gradually picked up him, floating him through the 'air', but the inner hollow didn't care. He was free. The torture was over.

The black hollow had disappeared shortly before his King had finally reached for him and breached the barrier. It had been the greatest pleasure of his short life, giving up his powers to his King. He'd finally gotten his revenge.

But he still needed help. The hollow wasn't even sure he could survive. Before she'd gone, the black hollow had lost her temper and driven her hand into his belly. Blood and other, more intimate things were spilling out of the wound. He rested a hand there, trying to keep everything in, but his strength was fading rapidly.

"King." He said softly, reaching out. He smiled at the sense of irritation he got from the orange haired teen.

_What the hell took you so long?_ Ichigo said and the hollow tittered to himself. _You almost got me killed, you stupid bastard!_

"Tch. And after everything I've done for you. So ungrateful…" The hollow closed his eyes for a moment, smiling to himself. Then he opened his eyes as the door opened and a familiar young man stepped into the room. Zangetsu just looked at him for a moment before speaking.

"Ichigo, come to your inner world immediately. When she spoke about someone who should have been broken, I believe she was referring to your inner hollow." The zanpakuto was beside him then, pulling him down and pressing a hand firmly against the wound on his abdomen. The hollow whimpered softly at the pain, but didn't pull away. He knew this was what he needed; he just didn't think it would be enough.

_What?!_ They both felt it as Ichigo made the transition to his inner world. "What are you – oh my god." The King stopped dead as he looked at his Horse. The hollow wondered how bad he looked. Probably very bad indeed. "How… how did this happen?"

"They sealed me off in a corner of your inner world, King." The hollow whispered as his life continued to fade. "They set up a barrier, to keep me from talking to you and Zangetsu. A barrier partly made up of your rejection of me…" That was nothing but the truth, and he rather enjoyed the shock on Ichigo's face. "It took them three days to bring me down. Another four days of torture to do this to me… they wanted me to submit to them, give them the keys to your power. But I didn't. I didn't." His voice was raspy and fading now. But he still managed to look at his King, his golden eyes dull with approaching death. "King? Was I a good Horse?" He asked weakly. He wasn't certain why the answer mattered to him, but it did. Ichigo just stared at him for a moment, his brown eyes full of an emotion the hollow couldn't decipher. Then he gently touched his hollow's cheek.

"Yes, Shiro. You were a good Horse." He said softly, leaving the hollow a bit puzzled. Shiro? Then he smiled faintly as his body began to fade away.

It was strangely fitting that at the moment of his death, he should be given a name.


	2. Awaken the Sleeping

Ichigo looked in the mirror for a moment before he pulled on his hollow mask.

Every morning, he was leaving his body for just a quick moment to do this. And every morning, the result was the same. A blank, featureless mask of white bone. There were no red lines, not even the slightest sign of personality. This was just a force, that he could use and command at will.

And it was wrong. If someone had told Ichigo he would miss his inner hollow, he would have laughed. But he did miss him. He missed the sarcastic, often cuttingly witty remarks his hollow made at the day's events. He missed that dark feeling of power in the back of his mind, the occasional sense that someone else was taking a look through his eyes. He'd hated those sensations before, hated knowing that his hollow was using him. But now he missed it.

And the reason his hollow was gone was a knife of guilt in his heart. The memory of that brutally tortured body haunted him, because he knew it was his fault. Ichigo had been so wrapped up in his own life, so happy that his hollow was leaving him alone, that he hadn't even thought to question it. Even when strange things started happening in Soul Society and he left to help, he hadn't questioned why his hollow seemed so uninterested. If only he'd thought to reach out, his hollow wouldn't have… died.

Although he wasn't exactly dead. Zangetsu said he would eventually be back, but it would likely take years for that portion of his power to recover from the hammer blow it had taken. Ichigo stared into the mirror for a moment before turning away and returning to his body.

He'd already gone to see the Vizard. Unfortunately, none of them had experienced such a thing before. Shinji and Kensei had actually communed with their hollows to see if they would be of any use, but the hollows had given the same answer as Zangetsu… time was the only cure. Kisuke hadn't been able to offer anything better. His tests had revealed the power was still there, but diffused and unresponsive to any of his tests.

So he finally went to school. But he couldn't help but feel especially depressed, and his friends noticed.

"What's wrong, Ichigo? You're acting like someone shot your dog." Keigo said cheerfully and Ichigo gave him a wan smile. He didn't really want to confide in Keigo about his hollow. Uryu and Orihime would be a better choice. They already knew all about him.

"It's nothing." He said and tried to put a happy face on, which satisfied Keigo. But Ishida was giving him a hard look, which suited Ichigo just fine. He really did want to talk about this to someone. He felt so bad about it…

As expected, Uryu cornered him during lunch. Ichigo was eating outside, sitting on a bench, when Uryu took a seat beside him and opened his lunch bag.

"Do you want to tell me what's really going on?" He said quietly and Ichigo sighed, looking at his bento box.

"It's my inner hollow." He said quietly, making Ishida frown. "He's… dead. Or something close to it."

"Oh. Well, that's a good thing. How did it happen?" Ichigo gave him a shocked and disbelieving look and Uryu blinked. "What?"

"Ishida…" Ichigo was about to say something hot and angry, but then managed to get a grip on his temper. Of course Ishida would think it was a good thing. He'd seen the whole fight between him and Ulquiorra, and his hollow had stabbed him. Of course, his hollow had been pretty much insane at that moment, running on nothing but instincts and Ichigo's desire to protect Orihime. Ishida had briefly registered as a threat, which had prompted the attack. "He died for me. He died after being chased and tortured for days, and I didn't even _notice._" That part was quietly killing him. Ishida stared at him a moment.

"How did this happen?" He asked quietly and Ichigo explained it as best he could. It was mostly speculation from Zangetsu. Somehow, that alien power the woman had been using had let her infect and separate a tiny portion of his inner world. The barrier had been made partially of that energy, but largely of Ichigo's rejection of his internal hollow. They had used that rejection to create a prison for Shiro, then hunted him down. When he finished, Ishida sighed. "Ichigo, you can't save everyone."

"I know that, but it happened right under my nose!" Ichigo said hotly. "And he died protecting me." He would never have believed that his hollow had a need to protect, but maybe they shared more than he thought. Or maybe it was just that the Horse would not betray his King to an outsider. "And my power is weaker now." He honestly didn't care much about that, but that would probably reach Uryu more. The Quincy frowned. "Without his personality behind it, I still have my hollow powers but they're just not as strong."

"Hmm. Have you spoken to Kisuke about this?" He asked. Ichigo nodded grimly. "The Visored?"

"I've spoken to everyone except Unohana and Mayuri. I'm not sure I want to go to Soul Society with this." He also wasn't sure he wanted to talk to Mayuri about anything. Ishida grimaced.

"Don't talk to that freak. He might do something even more horrible to your hollow in his 'experiments'." Uryu said and Ichigo nodded ruefully. "What did Urahara say?"

"He said Shiro would come back, it would just take time." He said with a sigh. "That's what Zangetsu and the Visored said too." It seemed it was unanimous.

"Then you'll have to wait." Ishida said, his tone almost gentle. Ichigo stiffened for a moment, looking away. "Have you thought that you might damage your hollow further by forcing this? There is a probably a reason he needs to… rest."

"I hadn't thought of that." Ichigo bit his lip as he considered it. Uryu might have a point, although it was one that pained him. "I'll think about it." There probably wasn't much he could do anyway, but maybe Ishida was right. Forcing his hollow back to 'life' might be the wrong thing to do.

Nothing could help with the guilt, though. As he went through the day, his mind kept flashing back to the brief glimpse he'd had of Shiro's body. What had been done to make his hollow look like that? He'd seen some ugly things in the clinic but nothing on that scale. It had looked like he'd been skinned alive, but there had been more things than just the skin missing…

Pushing away that ugly memory, Ichigo managed to get through the day. Instead of taking the bus, he started to walk home. It was a long walk, but right now that suited him just fine. The last thing he was expecting was to run into something loud and annoying. But Don Kanonji had a way of turning up in the strangest places.

"Ah, my star pupil!" Ichigo winced at that, then grimaced as the TV star threw an arm around his shoulders. "How have things been? Have you seen any evil spirits lately, ahahahaha!?"

"Just one." Ichigo sighed as his thoughts drifted to Shiro. Then a very strange thought occurred to him. It was probably insane, but what did he have to lose? "Don? I was wondering. Do you know any way to contact a spirit that's, um, unwilling to reveal itself?" Don Kanonji considered the question for a moment.

"That can be difficult, Ichigo! It depends a bit on the spirit. Why would this one be avoiding contact?" He asked and Ichigo bit his lip.

"…Trauma." He said reluctantly. "The spirit was badly hurt and is almost unconscious." Actually, completely unconscious would be a better description for how Shiro's power felt at the moment. Or maybe catatonic. Ichigo shoved back his pain at the thought. Kanonji rubbed his face for a moment, considering the problem.

"Ah, that is troublesome! A spirit like that would be very hard to reach. I rarely bother with spirits like that, you know. They are not dangerous after all!" He said cheerfully and Ichigo's heart sank. It sounded like the nutty TV star wouldn't have any ideas either. Well, that was hardly a surprise. "The only way I know to contact such a spirit is to meditate on them and try to reach out to them. It requires a great deal of patience!"

"Meditate?" Ichigo blinked. That… was interesting. Shiro lived in his own mind, so there was even some possibility that could work. "Uh… thank you, Don Kanonji. I think I'll try that." He said, feeling a little dazed. He hadn't expected to find anything useful from this source. The TV star beamed and slapped him on the shore.

"That's my best student!" That was annoying but Ichigo forced a smile anyway. Quickly escaping, he turned his attention inwards as he walked home.

"What do you think?" He asked Zangetsu and received a mental impression of a shrug.

_Honestly? I doubt it will do any good for… Shiro. However, it certainly can't hurt and could benefit you greatly._ He said and Ichigo nodded. That was pretty close to what he'd been thinking. And he had absolutely nothing to lose.

The best place to learn to meditate was Soul Society. To his astonishment, as soon as he told Rukia what he wanted she suggested speaking to Byakuya.

"Nii-san is the best person I know when it comes to meditating." She assured him, which Ichigo could easily believe. But… "He's also good at teaching it." That was the part he had trouble with. Byakuya, teaching him to meditate?

"Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained." Ichigo said optimistically. Rukia led him to her brother, who was in his office sipping some tea. "Hey Byakuya!" He waved and received a calm but lethal look from the shinigami. Rukia hastened to speak up.

"Nii-san, Ichigo would like to learn to meditate. I was wondering if you could teach him?" She asked, and from the faintest hint of expression on that smooth face, Byakuya found it almost as ridiculous an idea as Ichigo did. Then the taichou looked at him thoughtfully.

"May I ask why you have this sudden interest in meditation?" Byakuya asked and Ichigo fumbled, trying to think of an answer. He finally settled on the truth.

"I'm, um, trying to connect with my inner hollow." He said and winced to himself as he saw Rukia stiffen in surprise and Byakuya's faint frown of displeasure. "He's sort of in a coma right now, and I want to wake him up again."

"Could you please explain how this happened?" He said and Ichigo sighed to himself, taking a seat and giving a quick rundown of how he'd found the hollow after his last battle in the Seireitei. He repeated what the hollow had told him, and how Shiro had vanished into a kind of death. "And you want him back? Correct me if I'm wrong, but is this not the creature that kept trying to take your body?"

"Yes, but he died protecting me." Ichigo said softly and saw Byakuya's eyes flicker. Apparently he'd struck a nerve. "Only one other person in my life did that." It was strange, comparing the evil side of his soul with his mother, but it was true. They'd both died to save him. "I couldn't do anything for her, but Shiro isn't exactly dead. I don't know if this will help, in fact I bet it won't, but Zangetsu says it's worth a try." It was a shot in the dark, really. Byakuya examined him for a moment before nodding and setting down his teacup.

"It would be best to do this in the Meditation gardens. Please, follow me." Ichigo rose from his cushions to follow Byakuya out the door.

He really hoped this would help.

* * *

Almost a month later.

Ichigo sat on the floor of his room, cross legged, and just let his mind clear.

He was finding that meditation was very pleasant. Zangetsu was happy with the results, saying that his inner world was looking better and some of the skyscrapers were returning, although it was still underwater. So despite the lack of results with Shiro, he'd kept trying.

So far, he'd had no luck reaching the hollow at all. Once or twice he'd felt a strange tickling at the edge of his mind, like he might be finding something, but as soon as he'd tried to grasp it, it had vanished. It was frustrating, but Ichigo didn't let himself be discouraged. If this was going to work at all, it would be a long and drawn out process.

Today, he decided to take a different approach. As he meditated, he pictured Shiro in his mind. Not as he'd been when he'd died, but the way he'd always looked when they spoke in his inner world. It hadn't happened that often, and the inner hollow had changed over the years, but Ichigo still found it easy to imagine him. For some reason, the picture that came to him was his hollow lying on the side of a skyscraper, his hair blowing in a spectral wind. Shiro was completely naked and Ichigo felt a strange prickle at the image, but ignored it. The vision seemed so real, as if he entered his inner world, it would be waiting for him. But that had to be an illusion. His inner world was underwater, not the windswept vista he was imagining.

"Shiro." Ichigo whispered the name, eyes still closed. Then the white body on the skyscraper stirred and opened black and gold eyes.

_King?_ The voice was faint, barely a tickle on the edge of his mind, but Ichigo's eyes shot open. He lost his trance and sought desperately for the voice he'd heard, but couldn't find it.

"Zangetsu? Did I just imagine that?" He asked his zanpakuto as he shoved himself to his feet.

_No. I felt it too. Ichigo, you definitely made contact. _The zanpakuto sounded less than thrilled and Ichigo frowned. _For a moment, your inner world… shifted. It was very unpleasant for me._

"Hm? What do you mean?" Shifted didn't tell him much, and he could sense the zanpakuto's frustration.

_It's difficult to explain, but for a moment it seemed like everything went on its side._ Ichigo blinked, reminded of the first time he'd gone into his inner world. How he'd been on the side of a skyscraper… then fallen down. _Yes, like that. It was unexpected, this place has been relatively static for quite some time._

"But I made contact with Shiro!" Ichigo wasn't going to let worries about his inner world distract him from that. He was almost ecstatic. After so long trying, he'd made contact with his inner hollow. "Can you speak to him, Zangetsu?"

_No. But I think that now you have established contact, he will return more quickly._ Ichigo's grin faded as he took in Zangetsu's tone. His zanpakuto really wasn't sounding happy at all. _I am afraid he will not be as you remember him._

"…Of course he won't. He went through a terrible ordeal." Ichigo said firmly. He wasn't expecting the hollow to be happy and cheerful. Of course, he'd been an antisocial jackass before, so that would hardly be any different. Ichigo suddenly frowned. "How do you think he'll have changed?" He asked, suddenly apprehensive. Shiro had been a complete pain in the ass before. Could that get worse? He felt Zangetsu shrug.

_I'm not certain. I just know he will have changed._ Ichigo scowled, shaking his head.

"Not terribly useful, old man." Giving up on the conversation, Ichigo began preparing himself for bed.

Sooner or later, he would get Shiro back.

* * *

Several days later.

Ichigo looked at himself in the mirror, and pulled down his mask.

"Ah, yes." His voice sounded echoing and strange, which was good. When he'd been wearing the featureless doll mask, he'd sounded far more like himself. And his mask was no longer featureless, which was better. There were red lines on the left side of the mask now. There were fewer than there had been before, but they were definitely there. "Shiro. Can you hear me?" There was no answer.

Ichigo pulled the mask off, rubbing his eyes. His sleep had been badly broken the past few days, and he suspected Shiro had something to do with it. He kept waking up from dreams that were vague but alarming, full of darkness and glass. Scowling, he stepped into the shower to get ready for school.

It was another boring day, punctuated by a few bits of creepiness. That came in the form of soft murmurs and sounds that he might have been weeping, or might have been laughter, just on the edge of his hearing. Ichigo almost wished he was just imagining things, but he thought the sounds were coming from his inner world. And Zangetsu could hear them too.

When he got home, Zangetsu finally told him what was happening.

_Ichigo, you should come to your inner world as soon as you can._ Zangetsu actually sounded slightly scared and Ichigo's eyes widened. _Your hollow has manifested, and he is acting strangely._

"You mean more strangely than normal?" He couldn't resist saying, but winced as he felt Zangetsu's anger at him. "Sorry. That was tasteless. I'll be right there." He went to his room and lay down on his bed, closing his eyes before focusing his attention inwards. When he arrived, it was to see a ferocious battle raging across his inner world. Zangetsu and his inner hollow were fighting, and Ichigo's eyes widened as he saw Shiro.

Shiro was laughing as he fought, or at least, Ichigo thought so at first. But after a moment of watching, he wasn't so sure. He thought Shiro might be crying, and that was even creepier than laughter. But sobbing or laughing, the hollow was driving Zangetsu back with a frightening ferocity. Gritting his teeth, Ichigo jumped into the fray to defend his zanpakuto.

"Shiro!" Ichigo shouted, his sword clashing with the hollow's. There was a frightening lack of comprehension in those black and gold eyes as Shiro attacked him fiercely. "Snap out of it! What's wrong with you?" He asked and was shocked and horrified by the keening laugh that ended in a violent sob. "Shiro!"

"We must subdue him!" Zangetsu called to him and Ichigo nodded, handling the berserk attacks with the ease of long practice. As he did, he realized that Shiro was even worse off than he thought. The hollow was attacking with frightening power, but his mind clearly wasn't really there. He seemed incapable of handling two opponents, focusing all his attention on one, unable to quickly switch.

That was the hollow's downfall, and between the two of them Ichigo and Zangetsu soon had him disarmed and pinned to the ground, squirming. Shiro struggled frantically to free himself, even to the extent of harming himself on their blades. Zangetsu had to sit on his legs as Ichigo pinned his shoulders down, to stop the hollow's thrashing.

"Shiro!" He shook his white double's shoulders. His clothing was different and his hair was short again, but the teen didn't have time for that. "Shiro! I am your King! Wake up!" He commanded, hoping that would reach the hollow. At first, he thought it wouldn't, but gradually the struggles slowed and he saw a hint of sanity in those gold and black eyes.

"King?" Shiro sounded completely out of it, lost and confused. But then the hollow stiffened and tried to jerk away. "Let me go!" He snarled and Ichigo frowned, glancing down at Zangetsu. The zanpakuto looked dubious. "Leave me alone!" The hollow squirmed and, against his better judgement, Ichigo let go of his wrists. Shiro rubbed the skin frantically, hardly even seeming to notice Zangetsu's grip on his legs. But the zanpakuto let go as well and Shiro scrambled away. Ichigo swallowed as he saw the hollow's head flicking back and forth, as he scanned for any danger, black and gold eyes wide and filled with something that looked like fear. Ichigo stepped closer and tried to touch his shoulder but Shiro jerked away. "Don't touch me!" He half-shrieked, making the teen and zanpakuto flinch. Then the hollow huddled up, rubbing his arms with his hands. "So cold." He mumbled, pressing his forehead against his knees. "So cold…"

"Shiro…" Ichigo could only watch with bitter regret as the hollow in his mind, who had always seemed so invincibly psychotic, crumbled in front of him. Shiro's shoulders were shaking and there was a sound suspiciously like a sob, and Ichigo wanted more than anything to hug him and try to soothe the pain away. But Shiro wouldn't accept his touch, so there was nothing he could do. Zangetsu tried kneeling in front of the hollow and speaking to him quietly, but Shiro just shook his head and curled up a bit tighter. "What have I done?" A new guilt twisted in him and Ichigo wondered, painfully, if he'd done the right thing.

Perhaps it would have been kinder to leave Shiro to his sleep.


	3. Shaking Apart

Shiro gazed at himself in a full length mirror. He'd found it in the mental analogue for one of the clothing stores in Karakura town, and it let him take a good look at himself.

He didn't like what he saw. He'd really enjoyed his appearance before, with the long flowing hair and the pretty jacket he'd designed for himself. Now, something had prompted him to change everything, and he knew what that something was. Just thinking about it roused too many feelings to deal with, so he pushed the thought back and just examined himself.

His clothing had gone through the largest change. Instead of the hakama and jacket, he was wearing white cargo pants and a black and white flannel shirt. The pants were large and held up with a heavy, black leather belt. Reaching down, Shiro played with the pockets on the legs, snapping them open. That was kind of fun. These pants might eventually grow on him.

He didn't like the flannel shirt at all, though. The only tight part of it was the cuffs on his wrists, and he knew precisely what it represented. Concealment. It hid his body, quite unlike his beautiful jacket. And his hair had been cropped back to Ichigo's usual hairstyle. Shiro fingered the strands, scowling. He'd liked his long hair –

_Even now, you're a beautiful thing. I love the hair._

There was the sound of breaking glass, followed by sad little tinkles as Shiro withdrew his hand from the shattered mirror. He was panting heavily, as if he'd been running, although he hadn't moved from this spot.

"Shut up, bitch!" He snarled, knowing he was talking to a memory. But it seemed to help and the mental pain receded, if only briefly. "Fuck!" Shiro gripped his hair, pulling on the strands. The pain helped ground himself. "I hate this, I fucking hate it." Gripped with a sudden longing, he tried to change his shirt back into the old, familiar jacket. He glanced down, running his fingers over the fur ruff, then glanced up at the broken mirror.

Then he screamed and punched it again, over and over until all the glass was gone and blood was running freely down his hands to puddle on the floor. Shiro leaned a hand against the wall, feeling dizzy. The flannel shirt had popped back into existence and he didn't try to change it again. It might not be stylish but it was safe.

The sound of booted feet made him jerk his head up, eyes alert and wary. But the hollow relaxed slightly as he saw it was only Zangetsu. The zanpakuto looked at him, his eyes calm and unjudging. He glanced down at the bloodied glass before walking over, boots crushing the shards.

"Let me see your hands." He said quietly and Shiro hesitated before letting the zanpakuto take them. The contact made him flinch, but he trusted Zangetsu. They'd never really gotten along, but Zangetsu was predictable in his behaviours, and that was a comfort right now. The zanpakuto began gently picking the shards of glass out of lacerated flesh, making the hollow hiss. "This is not normal, Shiro." He said quietly and the inner hollow laughed. It was a rough, jagged sound.

"No shit! I thought it was totally normal to see things that aren't there and punch mirrors out." Zangetsu's eyes flicked up to him and Shiro drew a heavy breath. "I'll be fine." The words were bitter on his tongue. Shiro hated nothing more than weakness. He'd loathed the weakness he'd sensed in Ichigo, the pathetic emotions he had for his friends and family. That garbage could get him killed and Shiro wanted no part of it. But now, he was suffering from a weakness far more profound than anything he'd ever sensed in the teen. And Shiro loathed himself more than he could ever hate Ichigo.

"It is perfectly normal to have problems after such an experience." Zangetsu said softly and Shiro snorted, pulling his hands away.

"I'm a hollow. We aren't weak!" He said angrily and Zangetsu shook his head.

"You are an inner hollow." He corrected Shiro, who scowled. "You may be capable of far more emotions than an ordinary hollow."

"Psh. So you're saying that King's infecting me with his weakness?" Shiro made the words into a taunt and was pleased to see Zangetsu twitch. They had very different definitions of weakness. "Just leave me alone. It's not like you can help me anyhow." He said, cruelly but accurately. Zangetsu embodied Ichigo's cool, logical side and he was even more of a stranger to emotions than the hollow. "…Thanks for the hands." Shiro added grudgingly. The zanpakuto looked faintly surprised, and the hollow knew why. Before this, he'd never thanked anyone for anything. But that kind of behaviour was why Zangetsu had never thought to look for him. Since Ichigo was about as useful as a metal rod in a thunderstorm, he'd at least try to keep in touch with Zangetsu. In fact, maybe he'd hang out with the zanpakuto for a while. His conversational abilities were about nil but Shiro wasn't interested in talking anyway. So when Zangetsu turned to leave, he followed.

He didn't want to be alone right now.

* * *

"_Pretty white thing." Ichigo heard himself whimpering softly as black fingers parted long, white hair. But it wasn't his voice, and this was not his dream. But he couldn't escape it no matter how hard he tried. "Still fighting for the King who hasn't even noticed you're gone." Ichigo caught a glimpse of a grinning face, black as night with shockingly white teeth. Inverted eyes looked at him mockingly before she yanked back his head and bit him harshly on the neck, pulling a gasp from his throat._

"_Fuck off, bitch!" The voice was his hollow's, and despite the defiance he sounded weak and in terrible pain. The words were followed by a cough that shook his body, aggravating all the wounds. Ichigo reeled at the pain, then grunted with his hollow as a knife sliced into his chest._

"_I keep telling you, lovely white thing, that's for you. Did you know you don't really need all of your ribs?" That sickening voice cooed in his ear. Ichigo was already starting to hate it. "Let's see if we can remove one, shall we?" The pain increased exponentially, but his hollow was too proud to scream, panting harshly with the occasional, muffled gasp as that knife cut through flesh and then sawed slowly on bone._

"_Ichigo." That voice didn't belong to the nightmare at all, and everything became hazy as Ichigo heard Zangetsu's voice. "Ichigo, wake up!"_

* * *

Ichigo jolted upright, dazed and confused.

For a moment, he could still feel the chains on his wrists, feel that knife doing horrible things to him. But then the illusory sensations vanished and he swallowed, rubbing his chest for a moment before he glanced at the clock. It was three AM in the morning.

"Zangetsu. Shiro, is he…?" He started to ask but his zanpakuto cut him off.

_He's having a nightmare. I cannot wake him._ Ichigo lay back down on his bed and concentrated on entering his inner world. Soon he was standing on the room of a building. He leapt down, searching mentally for Zangetsu. He was easy to find, along with the erratic pulse of energy that was his hollow.

Strangely, his inner hollow was sleeping in his own room, in this version of Karakura town. Zangetsu was standing beside the bed, looking at the hollow thrashing in his sleep. Shiro was making sounds that made Ichigo's heart clench. Stifled whimpers of pain and soft moans, they expressed his torment as well as any scream.

"When I try to touch him, he reacts badly." Zangetsu said quietly and Ichigo nodded. That didn't surprise him at all. "But perhaps it will be different for you."

"Maybe." Privately, he doubted it, but he had to try. Ichigo gently touched his hollow's shoulders and grimaced as Shiro tried to jerk away. "Shiro! Wake up." He called to his hollow. "It's just a dream. Wake up!" He tried shaking the hollow and had to jerk his hand away as Shiro almost bit him. "Shiro, this is your King! Wake up!" He said and that seemed to get through. The thrashing gradually stilled and white eyelids fluttered before opening to reveal strange, inverted eyes.

"King?" Shiro sounded groggy and confused, reaching up to rub a hand over his face. "What?" He blinked and scowled at the both of them. Ichigo was just relieved he was awake, and tried to touch his hand, but the hollow pulled it away.

"You were having a nightmare." He explained and Shiro frowned before sneering.

"Oh, was I disturbing my King's sleep?" He said and the mocking tone was familiar, but there was a dark undercurrent that Ichigo didn't like. "Sorry about that." He sounded anything but.

"That doesn't matter." Ichigo said, nettled by the implication that he was only concerned about himself. "I was worried about you."

"Worried about _me?_" Shiro lifted his eyebrows, then grinned. It was the darkest, least humorous expression he thought he'd ever seen. "Isn't it a bit late for that, _King?_" His tone was taunting and Ichigo flinched. The hollow rubbed his face for a moment then pulled himself out of bed. He was wearing black and white pajamas that morphed into the cargo pants and flannel shirt he'd worn before. Ichigo was surprised to see he'd added a black scarf as well, wrapping around his throat and flowing behind him. "I – huh?" Shiro gripped the scarf and tugged on it, to the teen's surprise. "Where the hell did this come from?" He muttered and Ichigo blinked.

"Don't you choose what to wear?" He asked without thinking and winced at the furious look Shiro shot him. "Uh, sorry." He said and the hollow scowled before shaking his head.

"I chose what to wear before. Now, all this just sort of happened." He said with a gesture that encompassed his wardrobe. Ichigo glanced at Zangetsu. The zanpakuto was always hard to read, but he didn't seem happy with that response. "I'll try to sleep during the day, while you're at school. Maybe that will help." Shiro rubbed his face again and Ichigo was guiltily aware that his sleep had been interrupted, too. But he couldn't have been enjoying that dream.

"Thank you Shiro. And I'm really sorry I didn't look for you sooner." He said softly. Shiro glanced at him for a moment then looked away.

"That's not what… nevermind." He muttered and Ichigo frowned. What had he been about to say? But his hollow gripped the edge of the window and swam outside before he could ask. He glanced at Zangetsu, but the zanpakuto only gave him a one shoulder shrug. Sighing to himself, Ichigo exited the inner world and settled down to try and sleep.

He hoped that eventually, his inner hollow would no longer be tormented by the past.

* * *

Shiro felt himself nodding off, and deliberately bit his wrist until it bled. The bright red fluid stained the cuff of his shirt, but that hardly mattered. The water would wash it away soon enough, and if it didn't, blood turned black when it dried. It would blend right into the black and white plaid.

He didn't want to sleep. Whenever he did, nightmares came. Mostly they were memories of his time with the black bitch, but some were fantasies generated from his new experiences. Those were, if anything, worse. Shiro had a very good imagination and his appreciation of pain was better than ever, so those nightmares could become vicious.

To try to avoid those dreams, he was attempting to survive on little cat naps throughout the day. It wasn't working too well. Not only was his power fraying badly, but Ichigo was also feeling the effects. His cat naps were broken by dreams too, light and foggy but still full of ugliness. His King was experiencing little echoes of them through the school day, which wasn't helping him with his studies. Shiro honestly had no idea what to do, though. He couldn't stop sleeping entirely, no matter how much he might like to.

Snarling softly to himself, Shiro drove his fist into the wall of the building. It hurt, but he wanted the pain, wanted to punish himself for being so weak. And it was weak. He didn't believe any of this should be happening.

"I am a hollow. I am strong. I will not let this rule me!" He repeated to himself. He'd said this more than once, but it didn't seem to help. "Rape is just another pain. It is nothing but something to take revenge for." And he did believe that, in his head at least. But the rest of him seemed to have other opinions. His body remembered what had been done to it, and some part of him had created these concealing clothes in an effort to protect himself from further violation. "_Damn_ it!" Shiro hid his face in his hands, then shivered violently. Gripping the scarf, he spread it out and tried to wrap it around himself. It stretched and lengthened in unnatural ways, until it was almost covering him. "Rape is just another pain…" He repeated to himself, trying to make the cold go away.

Maybe if he repeated it to himself enough, he would really come to believe it.

* * *

Ichigo stood in front of the mirror and, after a moment of hesitation, summoned up his hollow powers.

A few days ago, he'd called the mask up just to see if all the lines had returned. They hadn't. Instead, the appearance of the mask was shifting in ways that made him more than a bit worried. The red lines had always been on the left side of his mask, while the right was simply white bone. The last time he'd tried this there had been blobby tear marks of red leading down from that eye. Ichigo had been chilled by the change, but when he'd asked Zangetsu the zanpakuto hadn't been able to give much insight. He'd advised against asking Shiro, though. He thought the hollow would have no explanation and would only be distressed by the information.

Today, though, he saw something worse. Ichigo caught his breath as he looked at the mask and saw the spiderweb of cracks on the upper right hand corner. It looked as though he'd taken a punch there and his mask was about to shatter. But he'd just called it in. What could be happening?

"Zangetsu…?" He said and felt the zanpakuto's mental presence.

_I see it._ He sounded very unhappy. _Ichigo… I am afraid that your mask is reflecting Shiro's mental state. He is no longer fully in control of himself, and he has been trying to avoid sleeping. His power is becoming badly worn, hence the damage to your mask._ Ichigo nodded, frowning. _I believe the teardrops are a sign of his mental trauma._

"It's so hard to see him like this." Ichigo murmured, making the mask vanish. He would never have said it to Shiro – he could tell the hollow wasn't listening at the moment – but it was painful to see someone so proud and powerful reduced to such a state. Although Shiro was still proud and determined to deny his pain. That made it worse, in a way. "He needs therapy." Ichigo sighed and shook his head. Where in the world could he get therapy for a hollow? No Living World therapist could begin to understand what he'd gone through.

_Therapy?_ Zangetsu said and Ichigo blinked. It sounded like the zanpakuto was actually taking the idea seriously. _I am. Ichigo, Soul Society must have those who are skilled in helping with emotional wounds. Hollows can and do commit rape, and some shinigami have certainly fallen to it. Not to mention that shinigami and plus souls can commit such crimes as well._

"Are you seriously suggesting I take my hollow to Soul Society for therapy?" Ichigo couldn't help but snort at the idea. Most of Soul Society didn't even like the fact that he had an inner hollow. What would they make of the real thing? And for that matter, how would Shiro react to them? His hollow really was a lunatic, most of the time. Ichigo tried to imagine Shiro talking to Byakuya. His imagination failed completely.

_Ichigo… we have to do something, or he will shake himself apart. I've been watching him and he hardly sleeps at all._ Zangetsu's quiet anxiety wiped away Ichigo's amusement. _You woke him up too soon. I think this will only become worse._

"…Damn." Ichigo sighed, resting his forehead in the palm of his hand. "How do I manifest him outside my body?" He'd done that for Zangetsu, but he wasn't sure if it would be the same for Shiro.

_It is the same process for manifesting me._ Zangetsu assured him. _The hardest part will be convincing Shiro to cooperate. I would suggest you emphasis that he will be able to have some freedom outside your body._

"That's what scares me." Ichigo shook his head. What would Shiro do with even limited freedom? It was a terrifying thought. "Well, I guess I can take him to Soul Society and leave him there for a while." It would take some convincing, but he was sure he could talk them into it. They owed him a lot for helping them with their latest problem, and Shiro's suffering had been a direct result of that.

_Ah… Ichigo, that will not work._ Zangetsu sounded uncomfortable and Ichigo blinked. _You cannot simply manifest him and leave the reality. You must stay in the same world, preferably close to him. His body is maintained by your power._ It took Ichigo a moment, but then he cursed.

"I'm going to have to miss more school? Old man, this is crazy! I've already missed way too much." Ichigo sighed, running a hand over his face. "Sometimes I wonder if I should immigrate to Soul Society…" Unfortunately, the only real way to do that was to die. And he wasn't about to leave his family behind. "There's no choice, is there?" He couldn't just let Shiro shake himself to pieces.

_I am afraid not. Your father can concoct some form of family emergency and get your schoolwork for the next month._ Ichigo groaned at the thought. A month? But trying to fix Shiro was not going to be a quick process. _Hopefully a month will be sufficient for Shiro to stabilize somewhat._

"Great. Just… great." Ichigo grimaced, then concentrated on entering his inner world. Zangetsu looked at him in surprise. "Now for the fun part." He sighed as the zanpakuto looked at him questioningly. "Convincing Shiro he needs therapy." They could hold out the carrot of a bit of freedom, but he knew his hollow would still completely resist the thought of getting help.

He was too proud not to.

* * *

Shiro shivered violently as he curled up in his cocoon of pillows and blankets.

He wasn't sure what this space had been, originally. Not everything in this version of Karakura town was a faithful replication of the real town. For one thing, his King hadn't seen everything. There were a lot of houses with pretty exteriors and blank, empty rooms inside. He'd settled into one of those and set to making it a nest for himself.

He could have just stayed in King's bedroom, but he was feeling restless. Also, it was all too easy for Zangetsu to find him there. So he'd selected this cute little, gingerbread like house as his home. He just liked it, and didn't give a damn what anyone thought of his taste. Gathering up the pillows and blankets had been a pain, but now he had a serviceable nest.

If only he could get warm. Shiro muttered curses, watching his breath bubble in the water of Ichigo's inner world. He blamed the water, a bit. But only a bit. Before… that time… cold had never bothered him. Plenty of things about this underwater world _had_ bothered him, but not the cold. That was a new thing. But maybe if he just gathered up enough blankets he would be warm…

Shiro twitched and sighed as he felt two familiar presences. They were inside his house and it made him want to punch something. Preferably Ichigo, in the face. But he just curled up a bit more firmly. If they wanted to find him they could damned well work for it.

"I know he's in here, I can feel him. But where is he? We've checked every room." His King sounded frustrated. Good. "Is he under the stairs or something?" That made him titter, he couldn't help it. "I heard him! Shiro!"

"Ichigo, there is a crawlspace under the stairs." Shiro hissed as Zangetsu opened the door. "Here he is." The zanpakuto stepped aside as his King peered into the dark space. Shiro knew he probably looked a bit frightening, nothing but gold and black eyes shining in the darkness of the crawlspace.

"What the hell d'you two want?" He asked, his voice an exhausted rasp. Ichigo swallowed before crawling under the stairs with him. "Oi, I can come out, it's cramped in here." Shiro said, taken aback and a bit uncomfortable. This space was closed off and tiny for a reason, he didn't want anyone that close to him. But Ichigo just settled down on the blankets across from him.

"Oh, you've been sleeping in here." Ichigo sounded relieved and Shiro wondered what he'd thought he'd been doing. "Shiro, I want to take you to Soul Society and manifest you there."

"Huh?" The hollow said, completely taken aback. "What? Why?" He could see absolutely no point to that. "You wanna freak everyone out?" The shinigami didn't much like the fact that Ichigo and the Visored had inner hollows. They'd come to accept it more, but manifesting an inner hollow like a zanpakuto, well… that would be interesting. Ichigo shook his head.

"Shiro, you need some help." He said quietly and the hollow stiffened before snarling at him. The sound was animalistic and very hostile, but Ichigo went on. "Zangetsu thinks that there might be people in Soul Society who can heal you. It won't be easy, but you need some therapy. I'm sorry."

"Fuck you King!" Shiro suddenly snapped. _Therapy?_ What king of a weak pussy did his King think he was? "I don't need your pity! I'll be fine! JUST FINE! Leave me alone!" Dark emotions were welling up within him and he struggled to hold them back, forcing back the bitter words that bubbled up inside. He had so many things to say to his King, but it wouldn't help. What was done was done, and nothing would undo it.

"Shiro, your mask has been changing to reflect your mental state." Zangetsu's calm voice made him freeze. He'd felt Ichigo calling on his power but thought the teen was just checking to make sure he was okay. It hadn't occurred to him that there might be something different about the mask. "It has been changing, and the last time he called in there were cracks in the corner." He said and Shiro swallowed. He knew that was bad.

"Fuck you." He said but his voice was wavering. He sounded almost like he might cry, and Shiro hated that with a burning passion. "Fuck!" He pounded his fists against the wall of the crawlspace, hissing at the pain. Then he twitched as Ichigo grabbed his wrists. "Let me go King!" The touch almost sent him into a panic, but this was his King. He was the one person who was safe. Shiro winced as the teen's fingers travelled over half-healed bite marks.

"Shiro, what have you been doing to yourself?" Ichigo sounded shocked and horrified by the signs of self-abuse. Shiro tried to yank his wrist away, but his King had a good grip on it.

"The pain helps." He muttered, then sighed. He knew Ichigo and Zangetsu were right, he was a mess. "Fine! I'll go to your fucking therapy. But only so I can get out of this fucking aquarium." Ichigo managed a smile at that term for his inner world, and Shiro glowered at his King. "Don't expect me to be nice to people or some shit." He was going to be himself. Ichigo's smile widened into something more genuine.

"I don't think I would recognize you if you were nice." He said, gently teasing and Shiro huffed before pulling his arm away and curling back up into his nest of blankets.

"Call me when you need me. I'm gonna try to get some sleep." He could at least plague the teen with one more nightmare before he was yanked out of his inner world. Shiro wondered if his nightmares would bother Ichigo when he was outside of it. Maybe that was why the teen wanted to get him therapy… well, that and concern for his own power.

That Ichigo might be concerned about _him_ never crossed Shiro's mind.


	4. Creative Writing and Bento Boxes

Author's Note: I've never been in therapy and I have no idea how it goes, so I'm not going to detail that much. Instead, we're going to focus on Ichigo and Shiro spending time together. Good times!

Shiro sat on the bench and played with his scarf, scowling occasionally at the passing shinigami. They couldn't seem to resist staring at him, not that it was surprising. His hollow reiatsu was powerful, even when he was doing everything he could to conceal it.

Ichigo had asked him to do that. And he was the King, so what Ichigo wanted, Ichigo got. Shiro sneered a little to himself at the thought. Someday, he would be King and then Ichigo would find out what it was like to be the Horse.

He was bored enough to start counting the squares on his shirt when the door finally opened and Ichigo called for him. Sighing to himself, Shiro slouched to his feet and followed his King. He knew he looked every inch the sullen, unhappy teenager, but it fit his mindset right now. He wasn't happy to be here and he didn't care who knew it.

"You must be Shiro." The woman in front of him was wearing a captain's haori and it took Shiro a moment, but he identified her from his time spent spying on Ichigo. This was Unohana, taichou of the fourth. They handled everything medical, so Shiro supposed it was only logical that Ichigo would bring him to her. "I've never met an inner hollow before. Please, have a seat." Shiro sat down on a cushion and looked at the tea in front of him curiously. He slept, because he seemed to need it, but there was no food in Ichigo's inner world. Picking up the tea he took a tentative sip and frowned, trying to analyze the flavor. He didn't think he liked it. "What are you hoping to get out of therapy?" She asked and the hollow blinked.

"I'd like these fucking nightmares to stop." He said immediately. He hated the nightmares, hated the way he could hardly sleep. It was starting to make him feel dizzy. "I don't want to be cold all the time… and I want my jacket back. I want my hair back." He missed those fine, gossamer strands almost as much as his jacket. It was kind of funny, really, a hollow having so much vanity. But Shiro liked to look good, it made him happy with himself. And he wasn't happy at all with himself at the moment. "I want to stop being so _weak._" He spat the word out, full of self-loathing. Unohana nodded, not at all surprised.

"It sounds like you're being very hard on yourself, Shiro." She said gently and the hollow scowled, playing with his scarf. "But shinigami can be just as hard. I believe we can help you." Shiro frowned, wondering what made her think that. How would she help him get past this? He couldn't even imagine. "However, a hollow is quite unusual so I think I should handle your therapy myself. We will need to set up appointments." She pulled out a piece of paper and examined it as Shiro tried to read it, from the side. He thought it was a calendar of some sort. She seemed to have a busy schedule, but then, she was a taichou. She began writing on a piece of paper and handed it to him, then made a second copy for Ichigo. "Our first session will be tomorrow at three."

"Okay." Shiro said indifferently. Time had almost no meaning to him. "Hey Ichigo, I'm going to need a watch." He had no way to tell the time. Ichigo nodded, looking over the paper in his hand before folding it up and pocketing it.

"I'll take you shopping." He said with a smile. "I have quite a balance built up here." His tone was vaguely annoyed and Shiro gave him a quizzical look. "Oh… I just wish I could convert it to real world dollars. I could afford my first year of university with it." He said with a sigh and Shiro's eyes narrowed a moment before he grinned.

"Yeah? Well, let's go shopping King." He sounded almost cheerful, which made Ichigo look at him distrustfully. Unohana just smiled and shoo'd them out of her office, which was fine by the hollow. Being around so many powerful shinigami was a bit alarming.

Of course, wandering the Seireitei wasn't much better. People did double takes when they saw Ichigo with his pale clone, then triple takes as they sensed the hollow reiatsu. Shiro checked every single one for threats, hardly having any attention to spare for his surroundings. He'd seen it before anyway, although that had been through Ichigo's eyes.

They finally found a shop that sold watches and clocks of all shapes, sizes and prices. There were cases of glass, and Shiro gazed into them, looking over the watches indifferently. But one of them quickly caught his eye.

"Hey, King. What about that one?" He pointed to a watch that was really intriguing. It was made of a white metal, and it was skeletonized so all the little gears inside could be seen. They were decorated with very tiny diamond-like stones, which Shiro very much liked. Ichigo took one look at the little card beneath it and blanched.

"Shiro… that's a Cartier watch. It costs fifty thousand yen." Ichigo said and Shiro just gave him a clueless look. "That's a lot of money!"

"Yah, but you said you can't spend it right?" He said then rolled his eyes as Ichigo gave him a flinty look. "Oh fine. What's cheap around here?" He grunted, glancing around. The shop guy, who looked like he really wanted them out of the store, piped in helpfully.

"Anything that's not in a case is definitely on the cheap side." He told them and Shiro nodded, browsing through the watches hanging from little racks. None of them gripped him, though. But then he found a bunch of watch necklaces.

"Hey, I like this." He said, holding a pendant. The chain was some dark metal, iron maybe, and so was the filigreed heart around the watch face. The watch face was a simple white with black hands and numbers. Best of all, it had a tag. Shiro flipped it around to glance at the price. "Two thousand yen. That okay?"

"That's fine." Ichigo seemed relieved and Shiro just shrugged, pulling the watch off the hanger. Ichigo paid for the thing, then he tore off the tag and put it around his neck. It went a bit oddly with the flannel shirt, but Shiro knew it would look good with his jacket. The thought angered him, but it was an anger directed at himself. Shaking it aside, he followed Ichigo outside.

"I'm going to get something to eat and get a start on my homework." Ichigo said and Shiro nodded. "It might be a bit boring." The teen cautioned him and Shiro rolled his eyes.

"Ya, ya. Just you wait King, someday you'll be the one in the aquarium, not me. Then you'll really know the meaning of the word." Shiro said shortly and grinned as Ichigo turned and gave him his patented scowl.

"Never happen, Shiro." He said with a deathly edge to his voice and the hollow just sneered. He wasn't intimidated by his King.

"We'll see." Was all he said. Ichigo stopped at a sushi place and picked up a couple of bento boxes, handing one to him, to his surprise. "For me?" He questioned and Ichigo gave him a surprised look.

"Of course. You're here, so you should eat." He said firmly and Shiro just shrugged. Ichigo got them some drinks, too, and Shiro took his with a faintly bewildered air. He didn't even know how to open the thing, not really.

That proved to be not much of a problem, though. Ichigo led them to quiet little park area and they took a seat at one of the picnic tables, Shiro sitting beside Ichigo. He watched his King for a moment, observing how he opened the drink then tried it himself. He made a small face as it gave an ominous fizzing sound, then took a tentative sip. It reminded him a little of the tea he'd tried earlier, but sweeter and fizzy.

"King? What is this stuff?" He asked and Ichigo glanced over from his homework.

"Kombucha. It's a fermented tea drink." He said before going back to his work. Shiro looked at it distastefully, wondering if there was any drink around here he would actually like. Pushing it aside, he began sampling the bento box. He thought an adjuchas would taste a whole lot better. Or an arrancar. If his King had let him eat that one with the blue hair, they'd have been in a lot better shape to take on the freak with the weird shoes. Of course, his King couldn't do something like that, despite the fact that the bastard had done his level best to kill him…

Shiro found that he could barely finish half the bento box before he started feeling sick. Frowning, he pushed it away and glanced at Ichigo's work. Propping his chin in his hand, he narrowed his eyes and began checking everything over for mistakes. As usual, he found plenty. He'd tried to tell Ichigo before, but his King had always told his Horse to shut up. Shiro wondered if he'd listen any better when he was sitting right beside him. There was only one way to find out.

"Your answer for problem five is wrong." He said and shrugged as Ichigo gave him a pissed off look. "Well, it is."

"What would you know about math?" Ichigo asked and his hollow sneered.

"More than you, King." He responded in a contemptuous tone. "You screwed up on the third line, check your addition." It was a simple mistake, but it had put off his calculations. "And check problem eight, you've got the wrong value for pi." He wasn't sure how his King had managed to screw that up, but he had. Ichigo checked them both then cursed quietly before redoing his work.

"Seriously, how do you know anything about math?" Ichigo asked, this time sounding more curious than pissed off. His hollow shrugged.

"I like math." He said shortly and Ichigo gave him a dubious look. "What? I do." That was all there was to it, as far as he was concerned.

"I… see. Is there anything else you like?" Ichigo asked and Shiro nodded, resting his cheek against his hand. "Well?" Ichigo said testily and Shiro grinned. He did like getting under his King's skin.

"Creative writing." He said and Ichigo goggled at him. "Or I did, before you drowned the whole place and ruined the computer I'd been keeping my files on." He let his resentment enter his tone and was pleased to see Ichigo look a bit guilty.

"Oh. I'm sorry. I honestly don't know how to change it." Ichigo admitted and Shiro sighed, unsurprised. "I thought you were just joking about how much of a pain it was."

"Yeah, well, I have an active mind and it's hard when all I can do is write graffiti on the walls." Shiro grumbled before glancing down at his bento box. Bored, he tried another piece before giving up. "I can't seem to eat much." He wasn't sure why, but a little of this seemed to go a long way. "You want this?" Ichigo had polished off his entire box.

"Sure, if you don't." His King seemed surprised, but Shiro just passed over the box. "Hey, you know, you could write something here. I have extra pencils and paper."

"Huh? Uh… sure." Shiro blinked at the offer and readily took the pencil and paper. Thinking to himself for a moment, he decided to write up a fantasy he'd had for some time. It could only be a fantasy as long as Ichigo was the King, but if he ever lost his place Shiro had vowed to try and turn this fantasy into a reality.

The sound of pencil against paper was soothing, and Shiro managed to lose himself in a world of imagination for a while. Although his story probably wouldn't have gladdened Ichigo's heart. It was a pleasant dream about living in Hueco Mundo, and he'd just started writing a fight scene between himself and that blue haired arrancar. There was a subtext to it, too, but likely too subtle for Ichigo to pick up. Shiro preferred it that way, although before his… injuries, he might have written it more blatently.

He wrote quickly, even by hand, and Shiro had filled up several pages by the time his King was finished with his math. Ichigo sighed and stretched out his hand, cracking his knuckles before glancing over at his hollow. Shiro nibbled the end of his pencil, considering his story for a moment. Writing by hand was sort of annoying, since he couldn't go back and correct his mistakes.

"Can I see?" Ichigo asked and Shiro frowned before shrugging and pushing the sheets over. The teen picked them up and started reading with a frown. "Shiro… is this a story about you fighting Grimmjow?" He sounded disbelieving and the hollow scowled.

"Yeah, I like him. He was a damned good fighter, and pretty much a perfect match for you at the time. Not like that bastard after." Ulquiorra had pissed him off, toying with his King so much. Although if he was being honest, Shiro would have to admit that cat and mouse games were rather fun. Just not nearly so much fun for the mouse. "I'd kick his ass, of course." He said and smiled as his King scowled at him. "Just the truth King." And that was where the subtext came in. Shiro sighed to himself. Maybe, someday, he'd get to live that little fantasy. Although it would be a hell of a lot easier if the damned therapy helped.

"Ichigo!" They both looked up as a grinning man in a captain's haori walked towards them. Shiro made a face as he sensed the hollow reiatsu inside him, which was basically giving him the hollow equivalent of a one finger salute. He responded in kind, and both the shinigami looked at him.

"What? He started it." Shiro said sullenly, making Ichigo scowl and Shinji laugh. The taichou took a seat across from Ichigo, giving a bit of attention to Shiro before turning his gaze to Ichigo.

"Well! I've never seen anythin' like this." He said merrily as his hollow hissed insults at Shiro. Apparently, the two shinigami couldn't pick up the subtle energy going into it and Shiro's eyes narrowed. Unfortunately, since he was outside Ichigo's body at the moment they probably would pick up any response from him. So he just looked away, scowling, and tried to ignore the bastard. "Is this wise, though, manifestin' your hollow?" Shinji asked seriously and Ichigo winced, glancing at Shiro.

"He can say what he likes." Shiro said shortly in response to Ichigo's glance. His King was wondering if this bothered him, or something, but Shiro absolutely didn't care. Grabbing his papers he tried to go back to his story, but that damned hollow just kept hissing at him. What in fuck was his problem? Shiro had never gone out of the way to antagonize other hollows like this. Maybe the bastard was bored and lacked the imagination to amuse himself.

Shiro steadfastly ignored the hollow and the two shinigami, concentrating on his writing. He could easily picture those teal blue eyes, the wicked grin on the arrancar's face. He knew what it would feel like when their blades crossed, the weight of his strikes. He put all of that into his story, detailing the fight lovingly. He had no idea if his stories were actually good or not – there was no way for him to tell – but he tried very, very hard to make them realistic.

Ichigo was explaining his therapy to Shinji, and unfortunately, that gave the taichou's hollow extra ammunition. The pencil in his hand snapped as the hollow hissed one word at him. _Weak._ They both looked at him, surprised, as Shiro abruptly stood and leaned over the table, putting his face too close to Shinji's.

"Shut that fucking hollow up or I swear I will fuck start your face." He hissed, his eyes glowing with rage. Shinji looked ready to take offense, but then frowned and turned his attention inward. Then he grimaced.

"Oh. I'm sorry, Shiro-kun. My zanpakuto will try to keep a muzzle on him." He said and Shiro grunted, standing up straight and looking at his papers. He no longer felt the urge to write. Flipping his legs out of the picnic table, he stood and started to walk away.

"Shiro? Where are you going?" Ichigo called after him and Shiro paused a moment.

"I'm gonna walk off my temper. If that's alright with you?" He said and Ichigo looked at him with suspicion and concern for a moment before nodding.

"Just don't start any fights." He warned and Shiro huffed before walking off. His reiatsu was buzzing in the air, and people were avoiding him, which suited the inner hollow just fine.

Losing himself in the Seireitei was easy. Unfortunately, a bit too easy. Shiro stopped, frowning as he realized he had no idea where he was. He could feel Ichigo, though – he was always connected to his King – so even lost, he could find his way back. Sighing, he shuffled his feet, stuck his hands in his pockets and leaned against a wall, imitating a rather scruffy, depressed teenager perfectly. He didn't know what to do here. Sure, he'd watched his King plenty of times but it was still different from actually living in the real world.

"If only I were free…" Shiro sighed to himself. If he were the King, he wouldn't be in Soul Society at all. Everyone here could tell exactly what he was, and they were his natural enemies. No, there were hundreds of places he'd rather be than Soul Society. He had so many plans…

The wind seemed to bite at him and he shivered, coming back to reality and glancing around warily. The constant fear and hostility he sensed around him was putting him on edge and he finally decided to go back to Ichigo. He hated to feel dependant on the teen, but he didn't want to be alone here. He wouldn't put it past some of these shinigami to try and corner him and give him konso. Of course, what would happen to his King if they managed it was an interesting question that Shiro didn't want the answer to.

Following the bright spark of Ichigo's presence, Shiro discovered that he was more lost than he'd thought. It was almost impossible to follow the streets directly to his objective, so he finally gave up and jumped onto the roof of a building. That speeded things considerably as he leapt from roof to roof, flying occasionally. It was easy and fast and –

_Leaping over dark, twisted buildings covered in broken glass, long flowing hair trailing in the wind – _

That momentary flashback nearly killed the hollow. Or at least, almost hurt him very, very badly. As it was, he completely lost his concentration and fell, regaining his senses just in time to twist himself to take the impact. The pain was still scorching, and Shiro hissed as he felt bones snap. Cursing himself, he looked around and saw he'd landed in an alleyway. That was good, at least he'd be alone for a bit while he tried to recover. Forcing himself to his feet, Shiro tried to assess the damage. He grimaced as he looked at his left wrist. It was clearly broken.

"Great. Just fucking great." He mumbled to himself as he tore a sleeve off his flannel shirt and looked around. There were a few broken pieces of wood in this alley, and after a bit of work he had a serviceable splint. By his standards, at least. But he healed quickly, when someone wasn't constantly reopening his wounds. It would be functional by tomorrow. "Why do I have to be so fucking weak?!" Tears of frustration rose in his eyes, but Shiro forced them back angrily. "Shinji's hollow was right." He whispered to himself, sliding down the wall until he was sitting on the ground. He closed his eyes, lifting his head, expecting to feel rain on his face. Wishing he could feel rain on his face. It would be strangely comforting, right now.

But it was a clear day, and Shiro could feel Ichigo's reiatsu approaching him. Sighing to himself, he forced himself to his feet and went to meet his King. He couldn't help but limp a little as he walked. He'd hurt more than his wrist, although that was the worst of it. Everything else was strains and bruises that would fade in less than an hour. He forced himself to walk normally as he spotted Ichigo. He was damned if he'd show his King his weakness.

"There you are!" Ichigo sounded relieved and Shiro blinked as his King grabbed his shoulders. "I was worried about you. Are you okay?" He asked, concerned and Shiro frowned. Worried about him?

"Yeah, I'm fine." He said, keeping his left arm at his side. The flannel sleeve did a reasonably good job at hiding the splint. And really, he was fine. Although, if he'd gotten some extra power from Ichigo he could probably have healed instantly. But Shiro preferred to suffer a bit of pain than go into what had happened. "That shinigami gone?" He knew he was, since he couldn't feel the hollow reiatsu. But it made a good distraction. Ichigo nodded.

"He was just a bit concerned about you. He liked your story, by the way." Ichigo sounded a bit bewildered. "He seemed to think it was funny for some reason." That made Shiro smile slightly. Shinji must have caught the subtext, or maybe his hollow had explained it to him. But then, that Visored was a hell of a lot older than Ichigo. He might have gotten it on his own.

"You'll get it when you're older." He told Ichigo, who scowled at him. "Where are we staying, anyway?" Shiro had no clue, and he really just wanted to rest and recover right now.

"At the Kuchiki manor. Byakuya offered to put us up. Uh, there's going to be a lot of shinigami there watching you." He cautioned the hollow, who sighed. He wasn't exactly surprised by that.

"Whatever. I just want to get some rest." Ichigo gave him a skeptical look and Shiro realized his mistake. He was hardly sleeping at all right now, so why would he want to rest?

"Are you sure you're okay?" Ichigo looked him over more thoroughly and Shiro tried to edge his left wrist behind his back. "Shiro! What the hell?" Ichigo's hand shot out, gripping his arm and Shiro hissed in pain. "What have you done to yourself?"

"I broke my wrist falling off the roof like a moron. Do you fucking mind?" He said harshly and Ichigo looked at him like he was crazy. That pissed off the hollow more, and he scowled back. Shiro couldn't know, but that expression made him look more like Ichigo than ever.

"And you were just going to hide it? Shiro…" Ichigo shook his head and the hollow frowned. He didn't see why that was a problem. "We can stop by the Fourth before we go to the manor. They'll be able to patch you up." Ichigo said and Shiro jerked his wrist away with a scowl.

"I don't need it. I'll be fine, King." Ichigo gave him a skeptical look and Shiro sighed. "Look, I heal pretty fast, as long as I've got access to your power and someone isn't reopening the wounds all the time." Which was exactly what the black bitch had done to him. Shiro suppressed a shiver at the thought. "If you want to heal me, just give me some juice and I'll take care of it." Ichigo sucked at healing kido's, but when he was dealing with his inner hollow that didn't matter.

"Really?" Ichigo seemed startled by the thought. He gripped Shiro's shoulders again and the hollow was about to ask what he thought he was doing when a tidal wave of power poured in. Yelping in near pain, Shiro harnessed the energy and used it to heal himself. Then he sent the excess back to his King.

"Jeez! Learn some restraint, King! Do you chop grapes with Zangetsu, too?" Shiro complained and to his surprise, Ichigo grinned at him. Reaching down, he stripped off the makeshift splint and let it fall to the ground. "Well, I'm fine now. Show me this place we're staying, hey?" He was actually interested in seeing it. He knew from spying on Ichigo that Byakuya was some kind of fancy noble. Shiro wanted to see what kind of digs he had.

Hopefully there would be lots and lots of blankets and pillows.


	5. Midnight Conversations and Sugar Highs

Shiro sat on the edge of the roof and tried to practice the breathing exercises Unohana had taught him.

Therapy wasn't very pleasant, but Shiro hadn't expected it to be. Unohana had explained that he was suffering from post traumatic stress. His nightmares, flashbacks and constant need to stay on guard were apparently pretty typical. So they were doing cognitive behavior therapy. From what Shiro understood, the goal was to find the thoughts and feelings that triggered his attacks, and substitute them for better ones.

He was still angered that he needed this kind of help at all, though, and that anger infected the exercise. Giving it up, he looked up at the moon. It was a full moon tonight, and he didn't want to sleep just yet.

Byakuya's manor was beautiful at night. The gardens stretched out beneath him and Shiro turned his gaze down, looking them over. He wasn't going to admit it to anyone, but he loved them. He would still have preferred to be in Hueco Mundo, with its stark, alien beauty, but he had to admit that this was just as nice in a completely different way. And he thought it was even more gorgeous at night, with the moonlight painting everything in shades of grey.

Shiro rested his chin in his hand. He didn't fit in at the manor, but he hadn't expected to. The servants were scared of him, which was only sensible. Byakuya's guards were constantly watching him, and Byakuya himself actually seemed to be interested in Ichigo's inner hollow. He'd commented, with just the tiniest hint of malice, that Shiro seemed to have better manners than Ichigo. It made him wonder what his King had done to the guy. Knowing Ichigo, he'd probably just used his first name one too many times.

His room at the Kuchiki manor was simple but comfortable, and the servants had been accommodating when he'd asked for more blankets and pillows. He had a good nest, but it was still hard to sleep. At least Ichigo wasn't experiencing his nightmares anymore. He wasn't sure if his King realized exactly what had been done to him, and if he didn't Shiro didn't want him to find out. Zangetsu definitely knew, but Ichigo could be a hell of a lot thicker than the zanpakuto.

Shiro let his thoughts wander to his plans for the future. Hopeless, futile plans, unless he could become the King. He was vaguely aware of Ichigo approaching – he really had no control over his reiatsu whatsoever – but didn't look, just gazing into the sky. In addition to the moon, there was a beautiful canopy of stars.

"Hey." Ichigo said softly, taking a seat beside him. "Couldn't sleep?" He asked and Shiro shrugged.

"No." He said and glanced over at the teen. "And you?" It seemed odd that he'd be out here this late at night. Ichigo shrugged.

"I woke up in the middle of the night and decided to check on you. When I saw you weren't in your room, I thought I'd go see what you're up to." He said before gazing out over the gardens. "This is really pretty at night. I like it better in the daytime, though. More colors." Shiro nodded although he didn't quite agree. He liked it better at night, but his King was certainly right about the colors.

"It's nice." He said softly. "I'd never be here if I was King, though." Just too dangerous. Ichigo gave him a small frown.

"What would you do, if you were King?" He asked and Shiro noticed a strange tension in his voice. Was Ichigo afraid of what he would do? Well, some of it would no doubt be distasteful for him. Shiro shrugged, then smiled faintly as he thought about it.

"Well, first off, I'd impersonate you long enough to drain your bank account." He said and had the satisfaction of seeing his King gape at him like a fish out of water. "Then I'd take the quickest train to Tokyo."

"Wait, what? Tokyo? Why Tokyo? And what would you want with my college fund?" Ichigo's flabber was clearly ghasted. Shiro grinned. This was actually fun, telling his King this.

"Well I couldn't stay in Karakura town. All your annoying friends would be trying to exorcise me or something." He pointed out. "Then I might have to hurt them, and that would just be a pain with you fighting me all the time." Ichigo scowled at that but Shiro went on. "So I'd go to Tokyo. I could keep your appearance if I wanted to, ya know. So then I'd take your college fund and have a hell of a time. Go to all the hottest night clubs, see the strippers, visit the casinos… get a fake ID first, you're too fucking young King… see about getting laid –"

"Okay! Okay! I get it!" Ichigo interrupted hastily as Shiro grinned. Then, to his surprise, the teen laughed. "That's actually sort of a relief." He confessed and Shiro gave him a surprised look. "I thought you might hurt my friends or family."

"Tch. Silly idea. Those people mean everything to you, if I started hurting them you'd be giving me the ride of my life." Shiro smiled as Ichigo looked a little confused. "The Horse can always challenge the King, Ichigo. I'm just biding my time, waiting for a weak point. But if I started killing off your friends, would you wait? Pssh, I think not. Besides, it's not like I have anything against your friends. I kinda like some of them actually." Shiro scratched his ear, thinking about it. "Chad's nice, he'd make a great fraccion. Orihime and Tatsuki would be good too. Ishida's too smart, he'd be the one to challenge my place as leader. If they were hollows, I mean." He added as Ichigo frowned.

"Huh. Well, what else would you do in Tokyo? See if the Yakuza are hiring?" Ichigo said with a smile and Shiro laughed.

"Hah! No, the Yakuza can go fuck themselves. See, when I'm almost out of cash I'd leave your body with the mod soul and shove him on a train heading back to Karakura town. Those losers could take care of your body." Shiro said with a grin. "'Cause you might win again someday, and then you'd need it. And hell, I might want to come back someday. Then I'd go to Hueco Mundo." Shiro got dreamy eyed just thinking about it. "And the first thing I'd do is get in a good fight." Shiro said dreamily. "With Grimmjow if I could find him. Then I'd go looking for a mate. Grimmjow if I could find him – ow!" Shiro rubbed his head where Ichigo had just slapped him. "What the hell King?"

"Mate? What the hell, Shiro? That's disgusting and Grimmjow would rip your balls off!" Ichigo said and Shiro sneered.

"Not if he had the brains god gave a gopher. Look, this is how hollow mating goes." Shiro hadn't planned to give Ichigo a crash course on the facts of life, but that was just how the cookie crumbled. "You find someone you like the look of and you release the pheromones that say 'hey, I want to fuck you.'" Shiro grinned at the look on Ichigo's face. It was really priceless. "Then the person you want can either release their own pheromones, which is basically saying, 'I'm interested. Fight me and then we'll fuck.' Or they can just refuse, in which case there could be a fight to the death." That happened a lot, since hollows didn't much like insults to their pride. "I don't think Grimmjow would be dumb enough to hold back his pheromones when a vasto lorde comes to court him, hehehe." Shiro couldn't help but titter at the word 'court'. That was putting it loosely. Ichigo face palmed at that.

"You're horrible." He said severely and his hollow just grinned. "So after you 'mated' Grimmjow, then what?"

"Cubs of course!" Shiro said happily and Ichigo's expression turned to one of horror. "What? Why else would we mate?"

"What the – what are you – Grimmjow's a GUY! That's just wrong!" Ichigo sputtered and Shiro laughed.

"We're hollows, King. He'd be made up of thousands of souls, half of them female. Physical gender doesn't mean a lot to us." He pointed out and Ichigo swallowed hard, looking a bit sick. "So yeah, cubs, and maybe I'd put together a fraccion to help raise 'em. I bet that cat would make some nice cubs." Shiro could picture them in his mind. He even had some possible names picked out. Then he blinked as Ichigo groaned, resting his head in his hands.

"This is the weirdest discussion I've had with anyone, ever." He said and Shiro just sneered. But then Ichigo pulled his head back up. "It's sort of reassuring, though." Shiro gave him a quizzical look and his King elaborated. "I was always afraid you'd hurt my friends. It's a relief to find out only my college fund is at stake."

"I'm not sure why you want to be a doctor anyway." Shiro said bluntly. "Seems like a waste of time." He'd been watching as Ichigo researched all the requirements for medical school and all the programs he'd have to go through. Not to mention all the student loans he'd have to take on. Probably because he wasn't personally involved, Shiro had made a mental checklist of pro's and con's and decided the whole thing was for the birds.

"I want to help people, Shiro. Not something you would understand." Ichigo said shortly and Shiro snorted. He was dead right about that, but he thought his King should think about it a bit more deeply.

"You can help people all kinds of ways, King. I'm serious here, you'd have to take on a shitload of student loans. And your stupid shinigami friends eat up way too much of your time." Shiro said, watching his King thoughtfully. Ichigo was scowling and looking down at the garden. "You can hardly keep your grades up right now, how're you gonna manage it in med school?"

"I know!" Ichigo suddenly burst out, slapping his hand against the roof. "I know. It's just… do I have to give up all my dreams?" He asked and Shiro tilted his head to one side, considering it. He thought becoming a doctor was a stupid dream, but it wasn't his dream.

"No, but…" Shiro considered the problem a moment. Maybe it would help his King to just lay it all out. "If you're gonna do that you need to tell your shinigami friends to fuck off and die, and probably sooner rather than later." He said plainly, making Ichigo wince. "You'll need to get good grades your last year of high school, and med school is going to be no damned picnic."

"How can I just tell my friends I can't help them anymore? Do you know how many times I've helped save Soul Society, Shiro?" Ichigo asked and his inner hollow shrugged.

"If you weren't there they'd think of something. People always do." He pointed out and Ichigo shook his head. Shiro shrugged after a moment. "Well, do what you want." He would anyway. Shiro couldn't really think of a single time his King had ever taken his advice.

They sat in silence for a moment before Shiro yawned. It was contagious, and a moment later Ichigo yawned as well. Ichigo smiled and pushed himself to his feet.

"I think that's a sign that we should go back to bed." He said humorously and Shiro nodded, following his King and sliding to his feet. Then he glanced over the Kuchiki manor behind him –

_Dark roofs in a twisted world –_

Shiro hissed and struggled to control his breathing, trying to follow Unohana's instructions. It wasn't working, and he shivered violently, gripping his scarf and spreading it over himself. Then a hand touched his arm and he yelped, jerking away.

"Don't touch – King!" The sight of Ichigo losing his balance pulled Shiro sharply out of his momentary flashback, and his hand flashed out to grip the teen's arm, pulling him back to safety. "Sorry." He muttered as Ichigo caught his breath. There hadn't been any real danger, he knew that – this was Soul Society and Ichigo could fly – but for a moment, he'd freaked out. "Damn it." Tears of pure frustration welled up in his eyes and he shoved them back viciously. "How am I supposed to mate anyone if I can't be touched?" He muttered to himself, then twitched as Ichigo very gently touched his shoulder.

"It'll get better Shiro. Trust in Unohana." His King's tone was gentle and Shiro hesitated before nodding. Unohana had said that his success would partly be determined by how dedicated he was, and Shiro was very dedicated. He badly wanted cubs someday. "Let's go to bed."

"Yeah, sure." Shiro followed his King, but couldn't resist wrapping his scarf around himself.

He still felt cold.

* * *

"Boring." Shiro sighed to himself as he walked down the hall towards the gardens, running a hand along the wooden paneling as he walking. "Mph?" He suddenly stopped as his agile and attentive mind registered a difference. Turning to look at the wall he'd just touched, he lightly tapped it with a knuckle. "Hmm." Stepping back a few paces, he tapped another section of the wall and black and gold eyes narrowed. The sound was different. "Interesting."

Smiling to himself, he began to investigate this small abnormality. It took a while for him to figure out how to open the secret door, but he finally managed it. It slid open to reveal an airy room filled with pillows and other little comforts. Raising his eyebrows slightly, Shiro stepped into the room and shut the door behind him.

"Does Byakuya know about this place?" He asked himself. It seemed doubtful. The hollow was no expert, but the furnishings here seemed to have a female touch. Idly looking through the scattered items, he found a smattering of comic books that seemed to be dedicated to romance. Idly flipping through one, he was disappointed to find it was all the emotional sort of romance. "Bah." Shiro didn't understand what women saw in these things. Or humans and shinigami in general. Of course, hollow 'romance' was very different. Dropping the comic, he kept looking around. "What's all this?" Hidden in a closet was a whole bunch of boxes. Shiro fished one out and looked at it, tilting his head. The pictures on the front showed something that looked vaguely edible, surrounded by smiling cat faces.

Sitting down on a cushion, Shiro opened the box to examine the contents. They were odd little things, puffy bits of breadlike substance covered in sticky white curls. He poked one of them then licked his finger to clean it. Blinking, he licked his lips, trying to analyze the taste.

"Sweet." He murmured, finally having something to connect to that word. "Huh." His King hadn't given him anything sweet yet so Shiro had no idea what it was like, until now. He prodded the little things a bit more, licking his fingers, then picked one up and took a bite. "Mmm." He closed his eyes in bliss as something sweet yet just a bit tart filled his mouth. Shiro couldn't know, but it was raspberry jam filling. "Love this." He murmured, and began eating the other buns. For some reasons, these didn't fill him up like the sushi. Finishing the box, he stood and went back to the closet, considering the contents. There were many different types of interesting things in there.

For a moment, Shiro contemplated the morality of the situation. But that didn't last very long. As far as hollows were concerned, if you couldn't defend your kill you didn't deserve to have it. Besides which, this was Byakuya's manor and the more he thought about it the less he thought the noble knew about this place. So all this food was illicit to begin with. What little conscience he had satisfied, Shiro pulled out more boxes and other interesting things and began to dig in.

He wasn't sure what all this stuff was, but it tasted excellent.

* * *

"Is your hollow improving?" Byakuya asked as Ichigo sipped his tea.

They were in a sitting room, just enjoying a quiet lunch of sashimi and parsnip cakes. Ichigo had never had those before, but they were quite delicious, filled with just a bit of spiced sausage and diced mushrooms. He tried one as Byakuya sipped his tea, then answered.

"He seems to be doing better. It hasn't been very long, though." Byakuya nodded at that reply. They both knew that therapy would be a very long process. "I think I've learned something interesting, though."

"Oh?" Byakuya asked and Ichigo nodded, thinking about his revelation. He'd already taken the time to question Kensei and Lisa, so he was pretty sure of his conclusions.

"My inner hollow is different from the Visored." He explained before taking another bite of the parsnip cake. "He's – mph – got more personality. They all say that their hollows are just mindless killing machines. I asked if their hollows ever give them advice, and they all said no. Shiro's… well, I thought he was a mindless killing machine until recently. But he's always given me advice. Often really sarcastic advice." Ichigo said with a sigh before taking a sip of his tea. "But sometimes pretty good advice." He had to admit. He'd never taken Shiro's advice because he'd distrusted the source so much, but once or twice he'd come to regret that. Byakuya considered him thoughtfully as he ate a bit of the sashimi.

"You said you considered him a mindless killing machine until recently. That has changed?" Byakuya asked and Ichigo nodded, thinking back to their talk on the roof. Until that night, it had never crossed his mind that Shiro had actual plans if he got in control of their body. And it would certainly have never occurred to him that the plans would be so relatively benign. Completely alien to him and his nature, but not the actions of a bloodthirsty maniac.

"He wants to have kids." He said and grinned a bit at Byakuya's slightly lifted eyebrows. "It sounds like a lot of kids. With Grimmjow, or another arrancar if he can't find him. I really wonder what Grimmjow would think of these plans." Ichigo wondered if Shiro was right about how the arrancar would react. If he wasn't, well, Shiro would probably kill him for the insult. Shiro was very proud of his looks and power and Ichigo didn't think he would take being spurned well.

"Interesting. We knew hollows can reproduce, of course, but I was unaware that an inner hollow would be capable of such a thing." Byakuya commented. "I –"

"KING!" Byakuya's hair flew from the force of that yell and Ichigo flinched back as Shiro gripped the edge of the windowsill, grinning. It was the same maniacal grin he'd worn when they'd fought the first time. "I found STUFF! And I ATE IT!" Shiro tried to scramble through the window but caught his foot on the edge and nearly smashed into the food on the table. But Byakuya managed to catch his shoulder and steady him before a calamity could occur. "I ATE IT ALL!" Ichigo sweat dropped as Shiro waved a box in the air. "Except this! I saved some for you! Aren't I a good Horse?"

"Are you drunk?" Ichigo asked suspiciously as Shiro dropped the box. Byakuya picked it up off the table to examine it.

"Dunno! What's drunk?" Shiro said happily before doing a lap around the room. Ichigo watched, wide-eyed. What had gotten into his hollow?

"Interesting. Where did you find this?" Byakuya asked and Ichigo blinked as he realized the box held some kind of sugary confection, from the pictures on it. Not the sort of thing that would normally be sitting around Byakuya's manor, since he was rather notorious for his dislike of sweets.

"There was this hidden door! I'm awesome so I got inside! And there was lots of girly stuff in there, romance magazines and things, and a closet full of that stuff! I figured it wasn't supposed to be there anyway so I ate it!" Shiro said happily before suddenly pulling Zangetsu out of thin air. "Hey King, let's spar!"

"Um…" Ichigo had thought there couldn't be anything more terrifying than his hollow giving him a crazy explanation about instincts while grinning like a maniac. But now he discovered that a sugar crazed Shiro, grinning like a maniac while wanting to play, was nearly as bad. He gave Byakuya a desperate look, but the taichou just smiled, ever so slightly.

"An excellent idea. He clearly has energy that needs to be burned off. There is a good area to spar outside in the gardens. Do not damage any of the buildings." He cautioned the hollow who looked a bit sad.

"Aw, I can't toss my sword around? Oh well, I'll still win and become King!" Even in the middle of a sugar rush that wasn't far from Shiro's thoughts. "Come on Ichigo, let's do this!"

"Okay, fine." Ichigo stood with a sigh then jerked back as Shiro practically vaulted out the window. "Shiro! Be more careful!" He shouted and an eerie laugh floated up from the gardens. "God." Briefly, Ichigo wondered what the Shinigami Women's Association would do when they found out their candy stash had been raided. Then he set the thought aside and followed Shiro out the window.

Hopefully, he would never find out.


	6. Butter

Ichigo smiled as he looked down at a white head snuggled against his leg.

He was sitting in Byakuya's garden, Zangetsu propped up beside him. Shiro's sugar high had been terrifying, but his sugar crash had been almost as scary. The albino had gone from being a feral ball of energy to yawning and staggering so fast, Ichigo had needed to pull his strike. Now Shiro was deeply asleep, curled up beside him with his head on Ichigo's lap.

Ichigo studied Shiro's face for a moment. It was hard to believe the hollow could be so… cute. But he was managing it handily, his face utterly relaxed in sleep. He was making soft little snoring sounds that were also rather cute.

"He's not having a nightmare, is he?" Ichigo quietly asked Zangetsu and received a negative from the zanpakuto.

_No. I don't think he's dreaming at all._ Zangetsu commented. _This has definitely been good for him, in more ways than one._

"Hmm? What do you mean?" Ichigo asked, daring to gently stroke Shiro's hair. It was incredibly soft under his fingers, much softer than his own.

_He's always been very bored, although he works hard at keeping himself occupied. It's different for me since zanpakuto are meant to live in an inner world. It is good for him to experience things._ Zangetsu said and Ichigo nodded. He was still a bit guilty about the lack of working computers in his inner world. And with all the water, Shiro wouldn't be able to use paper and pencils either. _The water is going down. Perhaps it will dry soon._

"I hope so. I'm feeling better, too." Ichigo smiled at the thought. It was strange that having his hollow out seemed to be helping him, but it was. Shiro was like a younger brother, perhaps, someone he needed to look after. And while the hollow could be extremely annoying he was also intelligent and witty. Some of his sarcastic remarks were hilarious. "I wonder if he would wake up if I picked him up?" He really needed to work on his school work.

_Likely not, but I can help make sure he does not._ Zangetsu said and Ichigo nodded before carefully shifting away and slinging his sword onto his back. Then he gently picked up the sleeping hollow, resting Shiro's head on his shoulder. It made him feel a bit strange, having the hollow that close, but he ignored the feeling and carried him back to his room.

Shiro's bed was a mess of blankets and pillows, despite the servants tidying everything daily. Ichigo smiled to himself as he settled the hollow into his nest, then gently pulled a blanket over him. He watched the hollow sleep for a moment before quietly leaving the room.

He did have a lot of work to do.

* * *

"Oooh." Shiro mumbled as he clutched his stomach. "I'm never doing that again, ever."

The sugar rush had been a ton of fun. The fight with Ichigo had been even more fun. The sudden wave of fatigue that had come over him after that had been surprising, but not bad, especially when he didn't dream at all. Very restful. However, when he woke up and found himself with a sugar hangover, well, that hadn't been good at all.

His stomach was killing him. Shiro whimpered, wondering if he could actually die from this. It felt like it, and he felt a bit bad for making fun of his King once when he'd had a stomach bug. Of course, Ichigo had been whimpering about wanting to die. Now Shiro understood why.

"Hey Shiro! Can you help me with something?" Ichigo. Shiro closed his eyes tightly, wishing for the teen to go away. He was not feeling well at all. "Are you awake?" Ichigo knelt down and gently shook his shoulder. Even that small movement was too much, and Shiro gasped before bolting out of his blankets and running into the bathroom. "Shiro?!"

The hollow retched, gripping the edges of the toilet as he struggled to bring up something, anything. He could feel the sweat beading on his forehead as the violent nausea tormented him. He wanted to throw up, he needed to throw up, but nothing was coming up and it felt absolutely awful… Then finally, he did throw up. That wasn't pleasant either but Shiro felt the nausea go down immediately, as he lost all that horrible crap he'd eaten. What in hell had he been thinking?

"Oh…" Ichigo gently rubbed his back as Shiro gasped, resting his face on the porcelain throne. "I think you ate too much sugar, Shiro."

"Ya think?" He said, his voice a raspy whisper. He just didn't have the strength to properly make fun of his King for stating the obvious. "I'm never touching that stuff again." It wasn't remotely worth it. He didn't resist as Ichigo flushed the toilet then helped him up, bringing him back to his nest of blankets. "Uggh." He lay back on the bed, putting a hand over his face. "Hey, what were you asking me?" He was still a bit nauseated, but puking had made a huge difference. And it might be good to have something to take his mind off the pain, anyway.

"Oh, I was wondering if you could help me with my creative writing assignment." Shiro lifted his head, already intrigued, as Ichigo grimaced. "I know you love writing, but I'm just not into it." He shrugged and Shiro nodded. He already knew that from watching his King doing his work.

"D'you just want me to do it for you?" He asked and Ichigo frowned. "I mean, it's not like me doing your math homework. Creative writing is something you either have a knack for or you don't, and you don't want to be an English major anyway." Ichigo looked slightly horrified at the thought, and Shiro grinned. "Besides, I'm part of you so it isn't technically cheating."

"Um…" Ichigo considered it for a moment, clearly debating the morality of the situation. "Well… Zangetsu thinks it's okay, so I guess it is. Just don't make it anything too risqué, please?" Shiro grinned at his King.

"You mean I can't write porn? Damn." He said and Ichigo looked like he was questioning the wisdom of this. "So what's the assignment? Any particular subject and length?"

"Oh, right. It's supposed to be at least four pages, typed, so probably eight pages handwritten. Here are the possible topics." Ichigo handed him a sheet and Shiro looked it over thoughtfully.

"Well, this would make for some pretty weird porn." Shiro said, a little surprised that he could talk about sex so easily. It was probably a good thing. "I think I can do something with the carnival theme, if you don't mind a really dark story." That could go some bad, bad places, but in a good way. Ichigo frowned.

"Well, I'll read it over when you're done. Try not to get too graphic with the blood and gore, but creepy is fine. My teacher is a big Stephen King fan." Ichigo said and Shiro tilted his head, wondering who that was. There were books in Ichigo's inner world, but only things the teen had already read and accidentally or intentionally stored in his memory.

"Okay. Why don't we do this together? Me writing while you do your other stuff?" Shiro asked and Ichigo smiled. The hollow was surprised at how good he felt, seeing his King happy.

"That's just what I was thinking. We can do it in the gardens, it's wonderful outside." Shiro glanced out the doors and nodded. It was looking good outside, and he liked working in the sunshine. It made him feel happy. And being around Ichigo made him feel strangely happy, too.

Shiro had no idea why, but he didn't question these things.

* * *

It was a cloudy day and slightly damp. Ichigo was wearing a coat over his shinigami uniform, and Shiro was glad of the warmth of his flannel shirt, even if he didn't technically need it. But there was plenty of light and the gardens were still beautiful, so they were sitting on cushions and working outside. The rasp of pencil and pen against paper was soothing, and Shiro smiled as he put the final touches on his work.

"Hey Ichigo, I'm finished the story." Shiro announced, holding up the pages. "You want to see?"

The inner hollow was very satisfied with his work. Taking the carnival theme and running with it, he'd created a story entitled Carnival of the Damned. It was horror, of course, and easily among the darkest pieces he'd written. Shiro had written plenty of dark pieces before, but he thought he'd given this one an especially creepy ending. He wasn't sure his King would like it, though. Ichigo had never shown any interest in horror before.

Sure enough, Ichigo was frowning as he read through the story. Shiro took a deep, long drink of his coffee, savoring the heat on his hands. He'd finally found a drink he enjoyed, although unfortunately it was quite expensive in Soul Society. But Ichigo was willing to pay the extra for some beans and Byakuya's servants could take those beans and make a wicked cup of brew. Shiro loved his coffee with plenty of sugar, and he was enjoying it that way now.

"Shiro... this isn't some kind of metaphore for our relationship, is it?" Ichigo asked quietly and Shiro blinked at him before scowling. He knew why Ichigo was asking, but he still found it vaguely insulting. And also rather ignorant.

"Tch, no. Don't you know the horror genre has three main endings, King?" He asked and Ichigo blinked at him. "No wonder you suck at creative writing. It's like this. First, you can have a hero who adapts and overcomes and manages to subdue the evil. But if you go with that, you're creeping into the adventure genre. Next, you can have a hero that fails. Maybe it looks like he was gonna succeed for a while, but it turns out that success was nothing but an illusion and he was doomed from the start. That can be creepy and all, but it's kinda depressing for the audience. Third, the hero can find out that HE was the monster all along." Shiro said with satisfaction. "That was the option I picked because if you do it right, it's creepy as fuck. But it has nothing to do with you and me, I was just trying to squick people out. Did I do it right?"

"Oh, you definitely did it right." Ichigo shook his head, smiling faintly. "I'd hesitate to turn it in, but I know my English teacher loves this sort of thing. I'll probably get an A. It will be a nice change from the usual C minuses, even if she wonders what happened." That made Shiro feel good. He'd never had any outside confirmation that his writing was good, before. Zangetsu had been completely uninterested and knew nothing about it anyway.

"Well, you won't have to write it out again. Our handwriting is the same." Shiro said and Ichigo blinked, looking at the paper in his hands in surprise. "Yeah, I only noticed that when you were doing your social studies assignment. Weird hey?"

"Pretty weird. Hey, Shiro, um... I just wanted to thank you." Ichigo said softly and Shiro blinked at him. "It occurred to me that I haven't thanked you for refusing to give up my power." The hollow stiffened slightly at the reminder, then sipped his coffee again.

"Pssh, don't think I did that for you King. I did it for myself. If you fall, so do I, don't forget it." Shiro said harshly and Ichigo just looked at him thoughtfully for a moment.

"You're lying." The certainty in Ichigo's voice made the hollow's mouth drop open for a moment. "Maybe you're lying to yourself as well as me, but I know you're lying. If your motives were that selfish, why would you ask me if you were a good Horse?" That made Shiro's mouth snap shut and the hollow glared at his King for a moment before looking down into his coffee.

"I don't know." He admitted, looking at the reflection of himself in the coffee. Then he saw a glitter of red in the murky depths and it suddenly reminded him of eyes.

The coffee cup shattered as his hands convulsed, and Ichigo started in surprised as his hollow abruptly cursed, shaking the scalding liquid off his hands. Ichigo yelped and darted forward, gripping Shiro's wrists and looking at the burns. The coffee had been very hot, and it hadn't been kind to the albino's skin.

"S'just surface injuries King. I'll be fine." Shiro muttered, and it was true, the burns were beginning to heal already. Soon they would be nothing but memories. "Damn." He'd thought he was getting past the flashbacks, he really had. "Shit, I wasted it." That really pissed him off. Ichigo shook his head, still trying to wipe off all the coffee.

"That doesn't matter, we can always get more. Are you alright?" Ichigo asked and Shiro looked up to see genuine concern on his King's face. But that suddenly angered him.

"Why didn't you let me sleep until I was ready, King?" He demanded harshly and saw pain flash over Ichigo's face. "Why'd you wake me up so soon? Couldn't you have managed without your power for a while?" Shiro couldn't keep the anguish out of his voice. He didn't blame the teen for not checking on him in his inner world. Ichigo had always wanted him gone, it had probably been wonderful for him for a while. But he bitterly blamed Ichigo for awakening him before he was ready, and he thought the teen had done it to recover his hollow power. Why else would he want his inner hollow back?

"Shiro... you died for me. I just wanted to fix it, wanted to make it up to you somehow. I... missed you." That made the hollow stare. Missed him? "I'm sorry I hurt you." Now Ichigo really did sound guilty and he gently touched Shiro's hands, mindful of the mostly healed burns.

"You're weird King." Shiro muttered, looking down at his and Ichigo's hands. "I understood you better when you treated me like dirt." At least hatred made sense. Rejection made sense. What was going on now, he just didn't understand.

"Shiro, would you like to go to the cafe in the Seireitei? The one with the jam buns?" Ichigo was clearly changing the subject and combining it with a bribe. But that suited Shiro just fine. After his first nightmare of an experience he'd learned moderation, but he still loved those jam buns with the little white curls on top. He'd found out that was shaved white chocolate.

"Sure, I could get more coffee there right?" He said and Ichigo nodded with a smile. "Okay." Ichigo kept a grip on his hand as they flash stepped out, and Shiro didn't pull away.

He wasn't sure why, but that felt kind of nice.

* * *

Shiro closed his eyes and tilted his head back, letting the rain run down his face.

He'd woken in the middle of the night to the sound of rain. It was kind of funny. He'd never liked rain, when he'd been trapped in Ichigo's inner world. But now the rain reminded him of the time he'd been strong and confident. When he hadn't really known the meaning of pain, when he'd been arrogantly certain he could destroy anything that crossed his path.

Now he knew better, but the rain still made him feel better. If he tried, he could imagine that he was back in Ichigo's inner world, lying on a skyscraper and enduring the water sliding through his long hair and soaking the fur ruff of his jacket...

That pleasant reverie was broken as a hand touched him on his shoulder. Shiro started, then recognized Ichigo's reiatsu. The teen had managed to surprise him, but he'd been lost in his own little world so perhaps it wasn't too surprising.

"Shiro, what are you doing out here?" Ichigo sounded distressed and Shiro blinked as he realized the teen's lips were turning blue. His aversion to the cold was only in his head, but Ichigo's was quite real.

"What am I doing here? What are you doing here? You're going to make yourself sick! Come on." Shiro gripped Ichigo's wrist and jumped off the edge of the roof, floating them down to the ground. Then he pulled his King into his room. "How long were you looking for me?" The rain had a curiously muffling effect on reiatsu sensing, and Ichigo's sensing abilities were crap to begin with. Unless Zangetsu had helped, it might have taken a while, and if Ichigo hadn't thought to ask the zanpakuto might not have thought to volunteer. Ichigo looked a touch embarrassed.

"A w-while. Ugh!" Ichigo winced, squeezing a bit of water out of his clothes. Shiro looked at him in exasperation before pointing a finger at him.

"Wait here." Shiro went to the bathroom and fetched a large, fluffy towel and a bathrobe. Bringing them out he helped Ichigo get out of his clothing, frowning as he saw it was absolutely soaked. His own clothes were still very wet, but that didn't matter. He was feeling better after his stint in the rain.

It made him feel strange, seeing his King naked. He knew what he looked like, of course. Shiro had seen himself in plenty of mirrors and he'd even explored his body a few times, usually when Ichigo was deeply asleep and would easily dismiss a wet dream. The action had seemed empty to him, though, and he'd hardly ever repeated it.

"Shiro, you're soaked. Aren't you going to get out of those clothes?" Ichigo asked, frowning, and Shiro sighed to himself. But his King had a point, he wasn't going to go to bed or sit on the chairs when he was sopping wet. Going to the bathroom, he made his clothes vanish and began scrubbing himself down with a towel. Then he pulled on a bathrobe, looking in the mirror.

His short hair suddenly irritated him unbearably and Shiro closed his eyes for a moment, concentrating. He looked into the mirror again, watching his hair cascading down over the bathrobe. He wasn't sure how long he would be able to keep it before having another flashback, but for now he would enjoy it.

Stepping out into the room he smiled as he saw Ichigo curled up on the cushions, looking very tired but warm and content. Shiro sat down beside him and put an arm around his King, not questioning why. He felt nice and smelled good, the faint scent of vanilla underlayed with a familiar, masculine scent. Familiar, because it was how Shiro himself smelled, but without the vanilla shampoo. Ichigo snuggled up against his chest and slid a hand through his long white hair, exploring the silky strands.

"I love your hair, Shiro." Ichigo said sleepily and Shiro abruptly stiffened as he heard those words echoed in another voice. Abruptly, the hair disappeared and Ichigo made a surprised sound as Shiro hissed.

"Damn it. Damn it! I can't get her out of my head!" He gripped the short strands and yanked on them, using the pain to chase the memories away.

"Shiro, shh. It's okay. Shhh." Ichigo's arms were around him then and Shiro stiffened, struggling not to react.

"No, it is not okay!" Shiro said sharply, but let Ichigo hold him. He'd gotten that far, with his King anyway. He still didn't like anyone else touching him, not that these shinigami wanted to touch him anyway. "When will this go away King? When will I be better?" He knew Ichigo couldn't tell him. Unohana couldn't tell him, she just assured him that it was a process. But who else could he ask but his King?

"I don't know, Shiro, but you'll be better someday. I promise." Ichigo said and Shiro shivered a little. He was cold again, but his King was warm and made him feel safer. Not safe, nothing could make him feel safe, but safer. "Shiro?" Ichigo said after a moment and the hollow glanced at him. There was a strange expression on his face. "Would you mind if I…" Shiro gave him a decent amount of time to say it, but the teen seemed to be struggling with whatever it was.

"Just spit it out, King – mph?" Shiro's eyes went wide as warm lips were suddenly pressed against his. He'd have been lying if he said it felt bad. But it was so unexpected he froze, unable to imagine how to respond. Ichigo finally pulled away from him and Shiro stared as he saw his King was blushing.

"I'm sorry. I've just been thinking and… I wanted to do that." Ichigo said and Shiro tried to comprehend it. He knew it was a kiss, of course. A gesture of affection. But why would his King show his Horse any affection? Although, they had been growing closer lately. It was very strange for the inner hollow, but he knew it was true.

"Why? Why would you want that from me?" He finally asked and Ichigo hesitated a moment before trying to answer. It was hard for him, Shiro could see that.

"You're… not what I thought you were." The teen said awkwardly and Shiro tilted his head to one side, willing him to go on. "Shiro, I like you. You can be kind of an asshole, but I still like you a lot." Warm fingers caressed the side of his face and Shiro drew a breath, trying to break this down into something understandable.

"You want to have sex with me? – ow!" Shiro hissed as his King slapped him on the back of his head. "What?" He rubbed his head, wincing at the sting as Ichigo gave him a scowl.

"I just told you I like you, and that's where your mind went? You're a pervert, Shiro." Ichigo said severely, but with an edge of good humor and Shiro blinked, wondering if he looked as lost as he felt. Because he was so completely lost it wasn't even funny.

"Ummm, King, you remember all those romantic things your mother used to watch when you were a little kid?" He said cautiously and saw Ichigo freeze up a little at the mention of Masaki. But it couldn't be helped. "You stored them all in your memory and I watched them before you flooded the place. Doesn't sex start with kissing? It did in all of those movies." Although those movies hadn't been porn, so they'd sort of skipped over the main event. Shiro still knew what was going on though, he wasn't stupid.

"Okay, true. But you usually don't ask about sex right after someone says they like you." Ichigo said and Shiro sighed a little. Reaching up, he pushed back a bit of his short hair. He wished it was longer, but it would do for now.

"But do you want to have sex with me, King?" Shiro asked softly, gazing into warm brown eyes and reflecting on how his own feelings had changed. Before his degradation, he would have laughed at the thought. He'd been almost indifferent to physical attraction then, and certainly hadn't thought of his King that way. And right after he'd woken up, he couldn't have even thought about that kind of contact without having a flashback to his torture. "Because I don't know if I can." He was surprised to find he actually wanted to. But feelings were stirring, nascent desires and strange emotions. And for a hollow, sexual desires were normal. Shiro had actually been a bit odd in not having any.

"Shiro…" Warm hands pulled him into another kiss and Shiro didn't resist. This felt nice. His King was safe, and the gesture itself was intimate but not threatening. His King gently nibbled his lower lip and Shiro moaned softly as he felt a heat starting to build. He still didn't think he could follow through but –

"Butter." There was a bright flash of light and Shiro flinched away as Ichigo looked shocked. "Butter. Butter."

"No, it's cheese Nemu-chan! Cheese!" Someone else said and Ichigo's eyes widened as Shiro just gazed around cluelessly. Shiro frowned and stood, heedless of how his bathrobe had opened to display most of his chest.

"Butter." Another flash and a bunch of feminine giggling that vanished into the brush. Ichigo suddenly snapped out of his daze to scream and grab his sword, chasing the two intruders out into the gardens.

"Come back here! Give me that camera!" His King screamed and Shiro just watched, puzzled. He was a bit miffed at something interesting being interrupted, but almost relieved. He really wasn't sure he was ready for any kind of intimate contact. Shrugging to himself, he snuggled into his nest and prepared to go to sleep.

Ichigo could explain this to him in the morning.


	7. Gossip Magazines Suck

Ichigo didn't manage to catch Nemu and Isane, but he didn't worry about it too much. He assumed they were getting revenge for Shiro's raiding of Yachiru's candy supply, and he'd no doubt find those photos pinned to their private blackboard for feminine wanking purposes.

It didn't occur to him that they might not even know who had gotten into Yachiru's candy stash. Byakuya had ordered his servants not to talk about it, and such orders were obeyed. And Byakuya himself certainly hadn't said a word to anyone. So the matter had remained a mystery… a rather expensive mystery. And the Shinigami Women's Association needed money to replace the pilfered candies.

For the next two days, Shiro and Ichigo pretended that night hadn't happened. Well, not entirely. They had a quiet and heartfelt conversation where the King admitted he was developing feelings for his Horse, and the Horse admitted he was intrigued but frightened by the thought of physical intimacy. They'd agreed to take things slowly, and consult with Unohana before going any further. She would know if this was a good idea or not. She'd already mentioned to Ichigo that he should make sure Shiro didn't get to try any liquor. Apparently, alcoholism was a very real danger in his damaged state.

On the third day, Ichigo and Shiro were both invited to join Byakuya for tea in the morning. The taichou was staring fixedly at a magazine in front of them as they settled down and tried their tea. Or rather, Ichigo tried his tea as Shiro took a sip of coffee.

"What's that you're looking at, Byakuya?" Ichigo tried to look at it upside down, but the glossiness of the magazine and the angle of the light defeated him. Byakuya looked up and Ichigo was surprised at the severe look in his eyes. Then he handed it over and Ichigo choked, staring at the thing. "Oh… my god…" He recognized the magazine. It was the most popular gossip magazine in the Seireitei. And the picture on the cover was a humdinger. "…" Ichigo's eyes roved over the photo of himself and Shiro in absolute horror. It showed him kissing his hollow's lower lip, gently tugging on the soft flesh. It looked loving and intimate and incredibly hot, which was great except for the fact that it was on the cover of a _gossip magazine!_

"Forbidden love: Romance between a shinigami and a hollow?" Shiro read the caption, which Ichigo had missed in his horror over the photo. "I don't think that was my best side." The hollow muttered and Ichigo choked a second time before slapping him upside the head. "Ow!" Shiro rubbed his head, scowling, as Byakuya looked at them both as if they were mentally deficient children.

"Do you realize what you've done?" He asked as Shiro picked up the magazine and began to thumb through it. "It is illegal for a shinigami to have sexual relations with a hollow." That made Ichigo blink. He honestly hadn't thought about that, since Shiro was in no way a normal hollow.

"But he's an inner hollow, part of me." He pointed out and Byakuya pursed his lips before nodding. "Wouldn't that make a difference?"

"And we haven't had sex yet – HEY! That was private!" Shiro suddenly yelped and Ichigo blinked, trying to look over his shoulder to see what had roused his ire. Then he snickered. It was a photo of Shiro exploring some freshly washed laundry and playing with a frilly bra. The hollow really didn't look too good in it. "Those bitches, I was just fooling around… oh man, they got a shot of me in the sunglasses too?" Shiro complained and Ichigo couldn't help but grin. The star shaped, rhinestone bedazzled sunglasses didn't suit his hollow much more than the bra had. "Can't a guy try on some glasses in peace?"

"I doubt anyone seeing the cover shot will believe you haven't had sex." Byakuya said, his tone as dry as the Sahara. Ichigo winced as Shiro scowled, putting the magazine down. "This only came out today. I will have to see what the reaction to it is, but I think you can anticipate an interesting reception."

"We won't end up dealing with Central 46, will we?" Ichigo asked. He distrusted them quite a lot. They had been reformed after Aizen's massacre, but it didn't seem to be an improvement. Byakuya only sipped his tea.

"I don't know. I'm not a barrister. They might decide to prosecute you, or they might decide that as an inner hollow, Shiro is technically not a hollow at all and no crime has been committed." Byakuya said, glancing at the inner hollow. Shiro frowned, not sure he liked that. Not that he wanted Ichigo pulled up on charges but he was certainly a hollow, even if his King was still alive and well. "You will certainly have to explain this to the Gotei 13." He said and Ichigo sighed.

"Ah, joy." He wasn't looking forward to that at all. "Will I need to bring Shiro?" He asked, mildly apprehensive. That apprehension only grew as Shiro grinned widely.

"Hell yes, I want to come! This'll be fun." They both gave him severe looks and the hollow put on an innocent expression. It only made things worse. "I'll behave, I promise."

"I suggest you leave him, but they may require his presence." Byakuya said and Ichigo grimaced before nodding. He wouldn't be at all surprised if Yamamoto decided that Shiro needed to be there.

"You could always take me back into your inner world, King." Shiro said seriously. "Then I'd be there, but they wouldn't have to look at me. Unless that would make them mad." It would clearly be an evasion. Ichigo sighed, rubbing his forehead. This had not been what he'd anticipated at all, when he'd woken up this morning.

"We'll just have to see what – um?" A hell butterfly fluttered into the room and announced it had a message for Kurosaki Ichigo. Ichigo grimaced before taking it. Not to his surprise, it was a summons to appear before the Gotei 13. And a moment later, Byakuya's hell butterfly arrived, summoning him for an emergency meeting. "They're pretty fast. I wonder if Yamamoto reads the Tattler." That made Shiro titter and Byakuya almost smile. It was a pretty amusing thought, the Soutaichou reading a gossip magazine. "Well, let's get ready. Uh, Shiro, could you wear something more formal?"

"You realize my clothing comes out of my imagination, King?" Shiro questioned and Ichigo nodded glumly. "And I'm not quite in control of that right now. But I can try. Um…" Shiro thought for a moment, then looked at Byakuya intently. His clothing changed and Ichigo snickered.

"That's pretty good, Shiro, but you might want to leave off the taichou's haori unless you really want to irritate people." He said as Byakuya looked less than amused. "And the hair clips really don't suit you." Shiro blinked and reached up to touch his head before swearing softly.

"I didn't mean to do that!" The inner hollow concentrated again and the haori and hairpieces vanished, leaving white robes and a black scarf. The robes and scarf matched Byakuya's perfectly, but with the colors reversed. "Is that better?" He asked and the taichou nodded.

"You should be quite acceptable. Follow me, we will take the family senkaimon." They were pretty far from the Seireitei, on Byakuya's estates, but that didn't matter. All the noble clans had private senkaimon at their disposal. Ichigo noticed Shiro smoothing down his robes uneasily and took the hollow's hand, giving him a gentle squeeze. Shiro flashed him a quick smile and Ichigo was privately amazed by how far they'd come. Before, Shiro would have probably rejected his gesture immediately.

Warmed by that thought, Ichigo followed Byakuya as they went to the headquarters of the Gotei 13. Most of the captains were already there, and quite curious about what was going on.

"Hey, Byakuya! Any idea why a butterfly disrupted my beauty sleep?" Kenpachi asked and Shiro cackled until Ichigo elbowed him in the ribs. "And why's the white freak in here?" That made the hollow scowl and give Zaraki the finger. Fortunately, he didn't seem to care. Byakuya gave Shiro a stern look before turning to his fellow taichou.

"I'm sure the Soutaichou will enlighten us soon." He said calmly and Kenpachi just shrugged, turning away.

It didn't take very long for the Gotei 13 to assemble, although Ichigo wondered why Yamamoto would call them all for such a relatively minor matter. Shiro had the same thought and said it out loud, making him wince. But Byakuya had an answer.

"To prevent individual questions and inquiries." He said and Shiro blinked, scratching his hair.

"Oh. I guess that makes sense, people can be a nuisance…" He trailed off as Yamamoto took his place at the head of the table. The head captain looked at the two of them severely and Ichigo couldn't help but blush, looking down at the table. Shiro just stared back insolently.

"Kurosaki Ichigo. I have called this special meeting to review your conduct with your hollow." The old man rumbled. Then his tone suddenly turned dark. "You are a disgrace to the Gotei 13! How could you do such a thing?"

"Technically, he didn't. We got interrupted by butter." Shiro observed and Ichigo hissed at him. "What? S'truth."

"Butter? Soutaichou, what is this about?" Mayuri asked, recognizing the reference to Nemu. Yamamoto huffed before passing him a copy of the magazine. "Oh. Oh my." The scientific taichou looked at the picture for a moment before grinning widely. "A glimpse into the mating habits of inner hollows, how interesting!"

"What?" Zaraki stole the magazine, making Mayuri squawk, and promptly burst out laughing. "Shit! So this is what Ikkaku and Yumichika were wanking off to this morning! Nice one Kurosaki!" Ichigo put a hand over his face in shame as Shiro tittered in amusement.

"What is this?" Shinji questioned and soon the magazine got all the way around the table. The reactions varied from disgust to amusement. Soifon gave them a particularly nasty look. Shiro seemed indifferent to the hostility, but Ichigo was sure that was a pose. His hollow was still very vigilant about threats.

"I don't see why what we do is your business." Shiro stated bluntly and Ichigo frowned but nodded. His hollow definitely had a point.

"The fact that you've failed to be even remotely discreet is our concern." Yamamoto told the hollow, and Shiro scowled but said nothing.

"Soutaichou, they were at my manor, in their private rooms. They had no reason to suspect their privacy would be violated in such a manner." Byakuya glanced at Mayuri and Zaraki. "Perhaps the taichou in question should attempt to reign in their lieutenants." Zaraki just grinned and Mayuri seemed completely indifferent to Nemu's extracurricular activities.

The meeting went on for a while, and to Ichigo's surprise and relief, the question of whether or not what he was doing was legal was only briefly addressed. It seemed the Gotei 13, and probably Soul Society in general, had decided that an inner hollow wasn't really a hollow. That made Shiro grumble to himself, but Ichigo thought they were right. His inner hollow had no hole, and he wouldn't until Ichigo was dead and actually hollowfied. So they were mostly worried about his conduct and how it would impact the shinigami. Some of them were afraid it would be the first step towards legitimizing relations between shinigami and hollows.

"Well, maybe you should decide if arrancar are really hollows or not." Shiro suggested in a bored tone. "They have shinigami features. It's something to think about."

"I can certainly investigate that. I already have some test subjects." Mayuri said with a grin and Ichigo shuddered to himself. Shiro scowled and tried to lean closer to him, which was difficult in the chairs. "I would also like to run a few tests on this particular inner hollow. I've heard he's quite a bit different from the ones the Visored possess."

"We think we know why that is." Shinji said. The Visored had been mostly silent during the debate, probably because they were worried that anything they said would seem self-serving. They also had hollows, after all. "Shinigami are already spirits, and don't naturally have any hollows. Ours were forced onto us by Aizen. But Ichigo is different… he's human. His hollow is part of him in a way ours are not. That might be why he's so strong." Ichigo sensed Shiro stiffen beside him and glanced over to see him place his head in his hands. His clothing abruptly shifted back to the flannel shirt.

"I wasn't strong enough… I… Can I go?" Shiro asked, raising his head and looking over the table almost blindly. Ichigo looked at Unohana and she rose from her chair.

"I will go with you." She said gently and Shiro nodded, standing up. The others at the table had the sense not to protest, although Yamamoto frowned a bit at the exit.

Ichigo let the rest of the meeting wash over him, concerned about Shiro. It was mostly about how the taichou would handle questions and concerns anyway. Apparently, they were expecting the noble houses to approach them, and Byakuya thought that was a very legitimate concern. Since he was a noble, he would know. The common folk would react in their own way but they wouldn't dare directly question the shinigami.

"Kurosaki Ichigo, you must refrain from anymore scandalous behavior." Soifon said, pulling him out of his reverie. He favored her with a scowl.

"The only thing scandalous in that rag is the kiss. They took pictures of us eating buns at the coffee shop! I can't stop other people's filthy minds." He snapped and she scowled at him. Then Hitsugaya spoke.

"Ichigo is right. Most of these pictures are completely innocent." He had the magazine and was looking at a few of the photos. "And Kurosaki is a substitute shinigami, not a full shinigami. Do we have the right to interfere with his private life, even if it is inconvenient?" Ichigo frowned. He hadn't thought of it that way.

"Kurosaki Ichigo, we would ask that you refrain from embarrassing us further." Yamamoto rumbled and Ichigo noted that he'd made it a request. So he didn't really think they had the right to interfere with his private doings.

"I'll do my best, soutaichou." He said as respectfully as he could. "May I go?" He was seriously worried about Shiro and wanted to see how he was doing. The soutaichou nodded.

"You may." Ichigo quickly left the meeting. He didn't think it would last much longer anyway. He followed the pulse of his hollow's reiatsu and found him drinking a bit of tea with Unohana and having a quiet conversation. They stopped as he came in but Shiro gave him a smile.

"King! So they've finished talking about us?" He asked and Ichigo grimaced before nodding. "Great! So what are we doing today?" He stood up as Unohana smiled at the both benignly.

"Well, I need to do my homework." He said then immediately weakened as Shiro looked disappointed. "But we could go to the sunglasses shop. You wanted a pair, right?" That made his hollow brighten and Ichigo smiled at that. He loved seeing Shiro happy. While the hollow had been living in his inner world, he'd been… content, perhaps, but not happy.

"That sounds great." Shiro said and they left together. Not hand in hand, but close. Neither of them noticed, perfectly comfortable with the closeness.

Gossip magazines or not, they weren't going to worry about it.

* * *

"This is pretty good." Shiro murmured as he read a romance novel.

Romance novels were not normally his thing. This one, however, was of the brand new genre he and Ichigo had inspired. On careful consideration, the albino was surprised it hadn't occurred to anyone before this. Vasto lorde were at least humanoid, and arrancar took it to the next level with extremely human and often attractive appearances. A romance written with an arrancar and a shinigami would have a natural conflict at work – forbidden love – and possibly a 'misunderstood monster' angle for the arrancar. Pretty hot stuff, really.

Some of the books were absolute drek, of course. Shiro had managed to track down one of the better ones and right now he was highly enjoying a detailed battle. He was pretty sure the arrancar was going to get reamed and taken prisoner. Then his shinigami lover would help him escape. The plot was rather predictable but that was okay, really. It was still excellent reading.

"Hey Shiro!" That voice wasn't Ichigo and the inner hollow looked up, surprised, to see Renji waving at him. The redhead came over and sat down beside him. "What are you reading – oh, that." Renji made a face as if he'd smelled something bad. Shiro just shrugged, glancing down at the book in his hands.

"It's pretty good if you don't mind the genre." A lot of the shinigami couldn't stand the new romance novels. But Renji shook his head.

"I don't mind that, it's just that the ones I looked at are absolute shit." He said frankly and Shiro tittered. "Ichigo said you can write, maybe you should try to make a good one."

"Hehe, maybe I will." Shiro grinned at the thought. He was sure he could make something really, really nice in fact. And since he knew how hollows mated, he could come up with some really interesting interactions between an unsuspecting shinigami and an arrancar. That would be fun. "But was there something you needed?" He didn't think Renji was seeking out his company just for the fun of it. The redhead ran his fingers through his hair.

"Well, I was talking to Ikkaku and Yumichika. We were wondering if you would like to come to the Red Lion with us." Renji said and Shiro frowned. "It's a bar, down in the Rukongai. A real dive but a lot of fun."

"A bar?" The hollow said dubiously. In general, he would love to experience going to a bar. He knew fighting could sometimes be involved and that was absolutely his thing. But… "Unohana said I can't drink any alcohol." And Shiro was afraid it would be a repeat of the sugar incident, only worse. People didn't usually get sugar hangovers, but they got regular hangovers all the time.

"They sell fruit juice, tea and punch." Renji assured him and Shiro considered it. Ichigo was going to be doing more homework tonight, after a bit of sparring with his friends. And it wasn't like they needed to stay together all the time. If Ichigo got into trouble, he could always recall his inner hollow to his mind. They were much weaker separated.

"Sure, why not?" Shiro shut his book. "When are we going? Right now?" It was getting late, it might be time. Renji grinned and stood.

"Sure." Shiro followed behind him, communing briefly with Zangetsu. He and Ichigo had discovered that the zanpakuto could be used to relay messages, which was useful when someone was going to be gone for a while. He mentioned that he was going with Renji but left out the fact that he was going to a bar. Ichigo might be concerned.

Seeing the Rukongai was a different experience for him. Karakura town had some nasty places, but nothing like the slums of the lower Rukongai.

"Didn't Rukia call this place heaven? I smell bullshit. And other shit." He added, wincing faintly at the stench. Renji grimaced.

"That's just what we tell humans and plus souls, to make them feel better. And since most plus souls don't need to eat or drink here, it's really not that bad." He said and Shiro nodded. Not having to worry about where the next meal was coming from would make it better. "But anyone with spiritual power does need to eat and, well, people do starve to death. Especially children." Renji sounded grim and Shiro scowled.

"That sucks." He didn't really know much about hunger, since he didn't need to eat. But he knew what would happen to a hollow that was starved. If they could regress, they would, and usually become mindless. If they couldn't regress for some reason – say, they'd been converted to an arrancar – they would eventually implode as the souls inside them cannibalized each other. It was a bad, bad way to go.

Shiro looked around curiously as they walked. Dirty or not, the Rukongai was a fascinating place. There were people everywhere, ranging from small children to big men with swords. They mostly steered clear of him and Renji, though. Shiro didn't think it could be his reiatsu – most of the people here had almost no spiritual power – so Renji probably had a bit of a reputation.

They finally reached the bar and Shiro looked it over alertly. It was definitely a dive. The wood was pitted and grooved, the tables were sticky and the glasses and dishes had only been indifferently cleaned. That didn't bother Shiro much, though, and it bothered Ikkaku and Yumichika even less.

"There they are! Renji, over here!" Ikkaku waved and Renji went to their table. Shiro followed behind him and glanced at what they were having. It looked like saki, although he was no expert. "So you got him, excellent!" The bald officer grinned as Yumichika just took a sip of his sake, eyeing him slightly.

"That flannel is so terribly out of style. Have you thought about changing it?" He said and Shiro winced before scowling as he took a seat. It wasn't really the shinigami's fault – he couldn't know – but it was still a sore point.

"I create my own clothing, and right now I don't have control of it, okay?" He said gruffly, then wondered if he dared… "I can change it back to what I used to wear, for a moment, if you want." A moment would be safe. He was doing much better. Yumichika looked interested, setting down his saki.

"If you could, I would be interested." He said and Shiro nodded, concentrating a moment. White hair cascaded over his jacket, and Shiro gently stroked the fur ruff for a moment before letting it go back to the flannel. He was starting to wonder if he'd ever use the jacket again. He still loved it, but maybe it was time for something completely new. "That was much nicer. And the long hair was quite flattering." That was a new way to put it and made Shiro smile.

"Yeah. Hopefully someday, I'll be able to wear it and not worry about having a flashback… hmm?" Renji had been off getting drinks and he handed Shiro a cocktail glass of orange juice. "Thanks." Shiro sipped the juice and frowned. "This tastes strange." He muttered to himself. He kind of liked it, though.

"The fruit might have been a bit old. So what's it like, being an inner hollow?" Ikkaku asked and Shiro suddenly grinned.

"Well, there's a lot of water involved." They all looked at him blankly and his grin widened. "Ichigo's always depressed over something. It used to rain all the time, but then he got so depressed he drowned the place. There's fish everywhere. I sometimes go out with a fishnet just to entertain myself." There was a stunned pause, then Yumichika laughed.

"An underwater world! How strange! Tell us more!" Shiro was more than willing to do so, especially when Renji got him a fruit punch. That tasted strange too, and Shiro rubbed his nose. It felt warm. His ears felt oddly warm, too.

"So what are your plans for Ichigo?" Renji asked as Shiro took another large slurp of his fruit punch. He was starting to get very fond of the flavor.

"Plans for him?" Shiro blinked, his mind feeling sluggish. What exactly was Renji asking? "I dunno. We'll… make love, I guess?" Before his trauma he'd have said they would fuck, but he didn't like to use that crude word for the act anymore. It reminded him of the female hollow's taunts. "Then we'll go back to the Living World and I'll be stuck in the fish tank again." Shiro sighed at the thought, but there was no help for it. When he was well he would go back to being part of Ichigo's power. He didn't expect his King to continue things then, although the thought made him sad. "I'll… win control! I'll become the King!" He suddenly said, too loudly, as he finished his fruit punch. It was just so _good._ "And… and… we can find Grimmjow and you can come too." He suddenly rubbed his face against Renji's shoulder. He'd never noticed how cute the shinigami was… "Yer cute." He said, then blinked. "Did I say that out loud?" He asked as Renji flushed and the other two at the table laughed. "No… forget Grimmjow… I could manifest Ichigo like he does me. We could have a three way! I… what's wrong with me…?" Shiro's head was spinning. He tried to stand but fell back into his chair, unable to stay on his feet. There was a chuckle from Ikkaku and he lifted his head, looking at the bald shinigami owlishly.

"Well, he seems pretty harmless. And a total lightweight. C'mon, let's get him back to Kurosaki." He stood and Shiro found himself helped to his feet, then almost carried. His bewilderment only grew with every step. He had no idea what was going on here. Why was it so hard to think? What did they mean, a lightweight?

The inner hollow simply had no clue.


	8. Antlion

"Renji, what the hell?!" To say Ichigo was incensed was an understatement. His friend looked a bit sheepish. He was currently holding Shiro up, one of the hollow's arms over his shoulders. Shiro blinked at him owlishly. "He's not supposed to have any alcohol! Didn't he tell you that?" Ichigo knew that his hollow was taking Unohana's instructions seriously. So this was almost certainly Renji's fault.

"We were just worried about you." Renji said and Ichigo blinked, trying to figure that out. They got his hollow drunk because they were worried about him? "He has tried to kill you how many times? We wanted to know what his intentions were."

"Renji, he's supposed to try to kill me. He's my inner hollow, he won't submit to me if I'm weak." Ichigo said, but a bit less irritated as he carefully took Shiro from the other man. His hollow almost collapsed against him, giving him a completely confused, strangely innocent look. Ichigo blushed faintly and looked away. "And if I lose it's not like it's the end. I would get to challenge him, in time." Shiro had admitted a while ago that his original threats of eating him completely had just been trash talk. The hollow couldn't actually do that, but Ichigo hadn't known any better.

"Yeah, well, we were also worried about what he would do in the meantime. But he just started babbling about having sex and making babies. Also something about manifesting you and a threesome with me." Renji looked vastly amused and Ichigo wanted to hit him. Or something.

"Are you drunker than my hollow? Ah, get out of here and don't do this ever again!" He huffed and Renji beat a quick retreat, stifling laughter. Ichigo sighed and helped Shiro to his room.

When he tried to lie the hollow down on his bed, though, he seemed to get ideas. Ichigo's breath went out in surprise as Shiro's arms went tightly around his shoulders and he almost fell onto the bed on top of the white hollow. There was a soft moan from the form under him and Ichigo's eyes went wide as Shiro rubbed against him. It was a full body movement that sent a burst of fire straight to his crotch.

"King…" The moan was soft and full of need. Ichigo swallowed hard as he felt that hard body snuggling against him, silently begging him for something he really shouldn't give. Brown eyes met black and gold and he could see that Shiro was nearly insensible. "Please…" Lips met his and Ichigo could taste the sweetness of fruit and the tang of booze. It was delicious. "Nnn…" Shiro's hands were on the back of his head now and Ichigo tried to pull away, but the hollow had a good grip. He let go as they both ran out of air and Ichigo gasped, just looking at his hollow for a moment. "Please…" Shiro's shirt suddenly vanished and Ichigo swallowed hard, his gaze going down that expanse of pale flesh. His hollow looked exactly like himself, and he'd never been particularly vain but Ichigo was aware of how much his body had hardened since he became a shinigami. Shiro was perfect, all rippling muscles and hard edges.

"We shouldn't…" Ichigo tried to pull away, remembering that his hollow was drunk. How would he react in the morning? But Shiro wasn't letting go and the white hollow let out a pitiful whine. Then the hollow rubbed against him again. "Oh gods." White lips found his again and Ichigo felt his resolve crumbling. Shiro was just too gorgeous like this, too fuckable, and he was a teenager. His body had needs. His lips found Shiro's again and he explored the hollow's mouth, savoring the taste of the alcohol. The hollow was shivering now, but he didn't think it was from fear.

"King… Ichigo…" Shiro breathed his name when they separated and Ichigo swallowed before working on his own clothing. White hands eagerly sought him, although the movements were uncoordinated and clumsy. Shiro's hands were warm, though, and Ichigo nuzzled the hollow's throat as he was fondled by his white double. "You feel good." He said, dazed, and Ichigo kissed him again.

"You taste wonderful." He murmured, seeing a bit more sense in those black and gold eyes. Then Shiro rubbed against him, his pants vanishing. Ichigo groaned as their cocks slid together, and he reached down to trap them both in his hand, rubbing them together. His hollow made a soft sound of pleasure but there was one thing missing… "Shiro. Do you have any hand cream?" There was no answer , the hollow was too distracted by the pleasure. "Shiro!" Ichigo stopped his movements and his white copy thrust up against him desperately. "Hand cream?"

"Nnn… bathroom…" Shiro managed to get out and Ichigo gave him a quick kiss before pulling away. There was a soft whimper from the hollow and black nails bit briefly into his skin before Ichigo got away from him. He quickly went to the bathroom and got the lotion. When he got back, Shiro's eyes were closed.

"Oh…" Ichigo looked at his dozing hollow, wondering what to do. Should he just leave? Guilt hit him hard for a moment. He shouldn't be taking advantage of Shiro this way. The teen sighed, putting the lotion on the ground and leaning down to gently kiss his hollow. He got a surprise, though, when Shiro's eyes flickered open and a white hand went behind his head.

"Mmm… lotion?" Shiro said, nibbling his bottom lip and Ichigo gasped.

"Shiro… we really shouldn't… agh!" Black nails bit into his skin as Shiro whined and Ichigo found he was losing his will to fight for a second time. "…Okay." But even if they were doing this, it didn't mean he had to penetrate the hollow. That might be going too far. Instead he coated his hand with lotion and stroked their erections together. Shiro arched, his mouth opening in delight at the feeling.

"Nnn, King!" He gasped as Ichigo groaned. The delicious friction, the sensation of hot, hard flesh against his, was incredible. He kissed the hollow deeply and Shiro responded passionately, their tongues tangling together. "Mfh!" Ichigo built them up with his hands, expecting to make them both cum that way. But Shiro had other plans. The white haired hollow suddenly shoved him away, to Ichigo's shock. He was even more shocked when Shiro rolled over, going on his hands and knees. "I want… everything! When I feel good and… not afraid…" Shiro explained, his voice breathy and halting. Ichigo hesitated, but for only a moment. His cock was aching and he desperately wanted more from his hollow. He wanted everything, too.

"Okay. Just relax." He said softly before he took a bit more of the lotion and gently eased a finger inside. Shiro was warm and accepting, all his inhibitions lowered by the alcohol. Ichigo was surprised at how easily he accepted it and quickly added a second finger, stretching him out. Then he hooked his fingers and smiled as Shiro tossed his head back with a whine. "Found it." He knew the secret to Shiro's puzzle box now.

"Found what… oh!" The hollow gasped as Ichigo tormented him a bit more with that spot, then added a third finger. "Nnn, Ichigo, take me!" His mind was reeling with the pleasure and the alcoholic haze. He wanted more, he _needed_ more.

He got it a moment later as Ichigo began slowly pushing into his hollow. Ichigo took his time, carefully seating himself in that tight, damp passage. Shiro was whimpering softly and he couldn't tell if it was with pleasure or pain. So he waited, gently kissing his hollow's shoulder, letting him adjust to the feeling.

"King, move…" Shiro quietly begged, pushing his hips back. That was all the permission he needed and Ichigo pulled back out then thrust back in, claiming the trembling body underneath him. Shiro cried out, black and gold eyes going wide as Ichigo hit him directly on the prostate. "Nnn, more!" The alcohol had blown his memories away, leaving nothing but the present and the sizzling pleasure coursing through his body. "Ichigo!"

"Shiro, oh god, Shiro!" Ichigo said as he gripped the hollow's hips, pulling him flush against him. "You feel so good…" Ichigo wasn't a virgin, but this was incredible. Shiro's body was gripping him in all the right ways, velvety walls tightening around his cock. He speeded his thrusts, rocking Shiro with the force of them and making the hollow cry out.

"Ungh, Ichigo… King…!" Shiro had no control in his drunken state, and he was a virgin on top of it. Ichigo nibbled his throat, feeling the hollow writhe underneath him, the muscles tightening around him. "I'm gonna… oh…!" Shiro's body quivered then went taunt as his orgasm came over him. Ichigo gasped at the feeling and followed him a moment later, spending himself in a rush of pleasure. "Nnn… Ichigo…" Shiro rested his forehead on the bed as Ichigo nuzzled his throat, gently licking away the beads of sweat from white skin. "Felt so good… will you stay?" He asked, sounding shockingly vulnerable. Ichigo's arms around him tightened for a moment, before the teen slowly pulled away.

"Of course I will, Shiro." He said, his voice soft and gentle. Shiro smiled, snuggling up before yawning and closing his eyes. Ichigo watched the hollow sleep for a moment before closing his eyes.

He could only hope Shiro would remember this in the morning.

* * *

When Ichigo woke up the next morning, he was alone.

At first, it didn't occur to him that that was wrong. He yawned, stretching out and just enjoying the warmth of the bed. Then he blinked as it registered to him that the bed was… different. The sheets were messy and folded in a way that reminded him of an animal's den. There were pillows everywhere…

"Shiro." Ichigo froze as he suddenly remembered what had happened last night. "Shit, what was I thinking?" And where was his hollow? Was he upset? Ill from the alcohol? Quickly pulling himself out of the blankets he went to the bathroom, but Shiro wasn't there. "Shiro?"

"King?" The voice was muffled but Ichigo relaxed slightly as the door opened. His hollow was there, wearing all his usual clothes and carrying a tray. There was a cup of tea, a mug of coffee and some porridge. "I love the view, but we do have a sliding door here." Shiro said with a grin and Ichigo glanced down, realizing he was naked and anyone in the garden could see him. Cursing, he quickly dug up his clothing and pulled it on. "Thanks King. I never bother with the curtains, since I make my own clothing." Shiro said, setting down the tray on a small table. Ichigo nodded.

"That makes sense… but Shiro, are you okay?" He asked and the hollow looked away. "I didn't hurt you, did I?" He couldn't help the anxiety in his voice. If he'd hurt Shiro, he wouldn't forgive himself. The hollow looked up, surprised.

"No! No, I'm fine, it's not that." Shiro said and Ichigo frowned, taking a seat on the cushion across from him. "It felt good. I'm glad I did it." He said, but there was something off about his tone. Ichigo's frown deepened as he took a sip of his tea.

"Shiro, what's wrong?" He asked, hoping the hollow would tell him. There was definitely something wrong. Shiro gazed into his coffee for a moment before looking up.

"That was alcohol they gave me, wasn't it?" He asked and Ichigo nodded. "Your stupid friends… why did they do that? I told them I couldn't have it." Shiro was upset, scowling as he looked down at the food. "It made the memories go away." His tone was softer, pained, and Ichigo swallowed. "It made all the pain go away. Now I know why Unohana said I couldn't have it…" Shiro shook his head and Ichigo reached out to gently touch his hand.

"You don't need alcohol to cope, Shiro." He said softly. He understood what was wrong now. Shiro had loved the way he'd felt under the influence, and was pained by the fact that he couldn't do it again. "It's going to be okay." Shiro gave him a weak smile before pulling his hand away and picking up a piece of bacon.

"Yeah, I know, I just have to forget about it. It's not like there's any booze in your inner world, if I start taking it all of this will be a waste of our time." He said as he crunched the bacon. One slice was all he intended to eat, and Ichigo started on the eggs. "I love bacon." He murmured, licking the savory grease off his lip. Ichigo laughed at the blissful look on his face.

"Everyone loves bacon." Ichigo said with a laugh. "Except for bacon jelly." He said with a faint shudder and Shiro gave him an inquiring look. "Orihime made it."

"Ah, 'nuff said. So King, what are we doing today?" Shiro asked and Ichigo smiled. They actually had a busy day planned out.

"Byakuya's asked me to help him in Hueco Mundo. Apparently, there's some serious chaos going on there. You'll be coming with me, of course." Ichigo remembered what Zangetsu had said about his hollow. Shiro couldn't be in a completely different world from him. The hollow looked very surprised, then grinned widely.

"Some action? Why King, you shouldn't have! Although you do know your power is about halved as long as I'm outside you, right?" Shiro said, concerned, and Ichigo nodded. He wasn't too worried about that.

"I know, but I can always call you back if we run into something tough." He said and Shiro nodded, although a touch dubiously. "And Zangetsu says that if we work together we can combine our powers anyway." That would result in something close to full power. That made his hollow cheer up a bit.

"Yeah, that's true. I wouldn't want anything to happen to you, King." Shiro reached out, caressing his cheek with a smile and Ichigo blinked, surprised by the intimate touch. He reached out to return the gesture, smiling back. Then he noticed something interesting.

"You've done something with your hair." He said, fascinated. He hadn't noticed because the style made it look short, but Shiro's hair was at least shoulder height. It had been pulled into a braid on one side, then looped into a bun in the back. The bun was held in place with on onyx comb set with little patterns of moonstone. Shiro reached up to touch it.

"I like my hair long, but it still messes me up so I decided to try something new. It doesn't make me look too girly, does it? I got it from a woman's magazine." He said, worried, and Ichigo laughed. "Would this be better?" Shiro's hair sudden changed again and Ichigo blinked, a little speechless as a wave of micro braids slid down his shoulders. They were each capped with a black or white bead. Then the hilarity of the situation struck him and he grinned.

"Shiro, you're acting like Yumichika!" He said to the hollow, who scowled. "Well, not really, he believes that anything he wears is beautiful because it's on him." That thought suddenly struck the teen and he caught Shiro's hand, surprising the hollow. "And that's true of you too. You look great, Shiro." He said and the hollow looked at him suspiciously for a moment before relaxing slightly.

"Thanks King. I think I'll keep it like this for now." He decided, turning his head and making the beads rattle. "I like the weight of the beads, and it works with this length." The braids fell just past his shoulders. Ichigo nodded. Braids that reached all the way down past his waist would probably be too heavy. "I've decided to keep the pants, I love these things…" Shiro popped open a pocket on his cargo pants before snapping it shut. "But I'm still working on the top. Want to see what I've got so far?"

"Sure." Ichigo said, interested. Shiro concentrated a moment and his flannel shirt vanished, replaced with… "A trench coat?" Ichigo examined it, a touch surprised. It matched the cargo pants fairly well, with buttons and buckles of black iron. However… "Why do you have a Quincy cross on the lapel?" He asked and Shiro grinned.

"It looks cool and I am totally not above stealing stuff." Shiro fingered the black pentacle shape with one finger. His micro braids moved smoothly over the white leather and Ichigo's breath caught for a moment. Shiro was extremely sexy like this. The combination was odd, but it seemed to work on him.

"Shiro." Ichigo pushed away his plate and stood as his hollow looked at him curiously. Then he gripped Shiro by his braids, smiling as the hollow's eyes widened. The kiss that followed was deep and intense. Shiro gripped his shoulders as Ichigo explored his mouth, nibbling on his lower lip like the first time –

"Ahem." They both flinched away from each other at the soft cough from the door. Ichigo blushed darkly and Shiro just grinned as Byakuya looked at them both severely. "It is time for us to leave for Hueco Mundo."

"Ass kicking time!" Shiro grinned as he stood up, reaching behind him to touch the hilt of his sword. It went a bit oddly with the trench coat, but Ichigo wasn't going to mention it. Besides, it had gone just as strangely with the flannel. "Guess we'll have to practice our technique later." He said as he gave Ichigo a perverted grin. The teenager blushed, scowling at him.

"You are completely shameless." He said as he adjusted his sword and followed Byakuya out of the room. The taichou was not dignifying either of them with his attention. Shiro laughed.

"I'm a hollow, of course I'm shameless. Ah, I can't wait!" Shiro said, pleased. "It's been so long since I was in Hueco Mundo." Ichigo blinked at the wistfulness of his tone. Did his hollow miss the sands and the reishi of Hueco Mundo? He probably did.

He was a hollow, after all. Hueco Mundo was where he belonged.

* * *

Hueco Mundo was as cold and dark as always. However, it was far more lively than usual.

"You're sure I can't?" Shiro nearly whined and Ichigo felt a deep desire to slap him upside the head.

"You absolutely can't. You're freaking people out enough already." He said firmly. Shiro scowled before turning his attention back to the dead body at his feet. Ichigo grimaced as a blue tongue ran over white lips. Shiro was just dying to eat the dead hollow, but it would not be a good idea.

Hueco Mundo was a mess, and the shinigami were trying to create some kind of order. Not that they cared much what went on in Hueco Mundo, but the problems were getting so severe that hollows were actually abandoning the sands for Soul Society. Ichigo would never have believed it if he hadn't been seeing it, but it looked like the population of Hueco Mundo had increased drastically. And while that was good in one sense – plenty of prey – it was also bad because there were more mouths to feed. The weaker were fleeing to survive.

"What could be causing this?" Ichigo murmured to himself. Why would so many Gillian have suddenly evolved and become ravenously hungry? Shiro shrugged.

"Must have been something Aizen did, although I can't imagine what." He said and Ichigo nodded. "Maybe it was just his presence and the Hogyuko, somehow suppressing natural evolutions. I can't see why he would have wanted to stop hollows from evolving."

"Hmm, maybe." Ichigo wasn't sure Shiro was right. It could be something completely unrelated, something that had nothing to do with Aizen. And there really was no reason the rogue shinigami would have wanted to suppress hollow evolution. Rather the reverse, he could have turned these adjuchas into arrancar. "Well, that will be up to Mayuri. You ready?"

"Yeah." Shiro said shortly, following Ichigo. He frowned, glancing around. They were clearing out this section of Hueco Mundo for the shinigami, so they could put in some kind of post. Shiro wasn't quite sure of the strategy behind it, mostly his own fault since he hadn't asked. Shrugging aside the thought, he let his senses range over the sands for something to kill. Then he stopped dead as a new and highly desirable reiatsu hit his senses. "Oooh." Slinging his sword over his back, he abandoned Ichigo to follow the trail.

"Aw." Shiro knelt down, a smile crossing his face as he saw the little baby hollow. It was a tiny cat with big, purple eyes and it was looking at him shyly. White braids slid down his shoulders as Shiro reached out to the cub, but it jumped back, startled and afraid of him. "It's okay cub. I'll take care of you." Shiro murmured, completely caught by his parental instincts and pheromones. If he'd been able to think he would have questioned things, but he was well past any rational thought.

So he followed the cub, trying fruitlessly to catch it. It seemed like the little hollow was always one step ahead of him. It was puzzling but didn't anger or frustrate him. Shiro just kept following, blinded by his desires and needs. Then suddenly the cub vanished and the hollow's eyes went wide as he slid down a tunnel of sand.

"Shit! …What the hell?" Shiro tried desperately to stay away from the bottom of the 'chute', sensing great danger there. He'd never seen an antlion catching its prey, but if he had he would have recognized his problem instantly. He was at the bottom of a funnel and the sands around him were very, very soft, too soft to let him escape easily. There was a harsh chuckle and something long and white snared one of his legs. Swearing, Shiro yanked out his sword and severed it. There was a small yelp of pain, but then a mass of sand was thrown at him. It knocked him down the wall of the funnel and he landed hard at the botton. Shiro gasped as large, powerful jaws clamped down on him. He felt it as they injected some kind of poison and the white hollow struggled to reach out to his King.

_Ichigo!_ Shiro blinked as he realized he couldn't feel anything from Ichigo at all. His connection to the teen was being blocked, but he didn't think this hollow was powerful enough for that. What did it mean? Snarling, he gathered up his power and tried to charge a cero. But the jaws on him just tightened, pumping more of the venom into his body. Shiro grunted, releasing the cero. It did some damage and the thing chittered, but not enough. He dropped his head, feeling cold and tired. What would happen if he died outside of his King's body? Shiro honestly wasn't sure, but he thought he would probably return to Ichigo. If so, there wasn't much to worry about.

That thought was a comfort as he slipped into the realm of unconsciousness.


End file.
